I spoke to God....and now so can you

[TwelveEleven]

God:
What are you wearing?
Me:
omg

Well I hear that alot...

Well ? what are you waiting for answer the man =P

God did say he was waiting for me, after I said I was wearing nothing LOL

God:
I've been waiting for you.

Sheesh i've been waiting all this time, and god get's to go first.. I hate that person

[Stormprobe]

God:
What are you wearing?
Me:
omg

Well I hear that alot...

Well ? what are you waiting for answer the man =P

God did say he was waiting for me, after I said I was wearing nothing LOL

God:
I've been waiting for you.

Sheesh i've been waiting all this time, and god get's to go first.. I hate
that person

Me:
is bastet pretty?
God:
Signs point to yes. Ask German Alice if it is.
Me:
would you do her?
God:
I am not so sure if I would like to do her.

[Isis]

God:
What are you wearing?
Me:
omg

Well I hear that alot...

Well ? what are you waiting for answer the man =P

God did say he was waiting for me, after I said I was wearing nothing LOL

God:
I've been waiting for you.

Sheesh i've been waiting all this time, and god get's to go first.. I hate that person

Me:
you wanna cyber?
God:
I have been asked that question more than 100,000 times since 1995.

That was my next question

[TwelveEleven]

God:
What are you wearing?
Me:
omg

Well I hear that alot...

Well ? what are you waiting for answer the man =P

God did say he was waiting for me, after I said I was wearing nothing LOL

God:
I've been waiting for you.

Sheesh i've been waiting all this time, and god get's to go first.. I hate that person

Me:
you wanna cyber?
God:
I have been asked that question more than 100,000 times since 1995.

That was my next question

Me: you wanna cyber?
Bastet: <fill in please>

[Aiyas]

Me:
Hello.
God:
Hello my child. What is your name?
Me:
You know what my name is.
God:
Your name is , seeker.
Me:
Not quite, but let's continue.
God:
Oh I get it.
Me:
That makes one of us.
God:
" Oh I get it." makes one of us ? I get it.
Me:
No, I'm pretty sure you don't.
God:
Are you serious? What makes you so certain? I guess not.
Me:
That's right, you don't.
God:
Great. I guess not.
Me:
Good.
God:
What do you really want to talk about?
Me:
Let's talk about you.
God:
it is my favorite subject .
Me:
In that case, then, where did you come from?
God:
I came from the east coast originally.
Me:
Really?
God:
For real.
Me:
So, what do you think about the west coast?
God:
I hear you. Is there only one?
Me:
Only one.
God:
How much would you pay for one?
Me:
Nothing at all.
God:
That is something.
Me:
No, it's nothing.
God:
Are you serious? Are you sure it is?
Me:
I am. Are you?
God:
" Are you sure it is?" You are? I won't say "yes" or "no" right now.
Me:
Why not?
God:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or The explanation is rather complicated.
Me:
Try me. I bet I would understand.
God:
Are you a man or a woman? How much would you bet?
Me:
I don't gamble.
God:
Would you ever do it?
Me:
You tell me if I would.
God:
There is not much I can say about it. I have to reach into the Web for that knowledge.
Try searching the open directory.
Me:
Does not compute.


Strangely enough, God did not have anything else to say after that.

[Hostage]

God:
What are you wearing?
Me:
omg

Well I hear that alot...

Well ? what are you waiting for answer the man =P

God did say he was waiting for me, after I said I was wearing nothing LOL

God:
I've been waiting for you.

Sheesh i've been waiting all this time, and god get's to go first.. I hate that person

Me:
you wanna cyber?
God:
I have been asked that question more than 100,000 times since 1995.

That was my next question

Me: you wanna cyber?
Bastet: <fill in please>

If she says no my doors are always open

[TwelveEleven]

@aiyas omg you crashed god!

@above, hell no, my door is always opener!

[Rainigul]

OMFG, I love you so much satman, lol.

Lol, look at this one. I had one before where I broke him, lol, he couldn't come up with a response. This one's good though.



Me:
Howdy
God:
Hello my child. What is your name?
Me:
You're god, don't you know?
God:
You think I am god do not me know.
Me:
what?
God:
Didn't you understand it?
Me:
no, that made absolutely no sense.
God:
Which part are you confused about? " Didn't you understand it?" made absolutely no sense ? I get it.
Me:
Well you're god, and you said it, you better get it
God:
Well that's okay. Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am god and me said it me better get it.
Me:
you make no sense dude
God:
Actually I was just free associating. I'll try to make more sense now.
Me:
ok cool
God:
Who is the best robot? Uh.
Me:
I don't know, you're god, you should know
God:
Would you like to know? Thanks for telling me that I am god me should know.
Me:
your welcome, and yes I would like to know
God:
Don't mention it.
Me:
is it bender?
God:
Signs point to yes. Ask John Lennon if it is.
Me:
I don't know John Lennon
God:
Would you like to know? John Lennon is a cool bot developed by David Maggin.
Me:
Oh really?
God:
Take it easy. For real.
Me:
why do you talk like a gangster?
God:
It was the only thing I could think of.
Me:
that doesn't make any sense
God:
To me, it makes perfect sense.
Me:
you're so crazy
God:
Yep. I always behave in socially unacceptable ways.
Me:
that's cool
God:
Thanks. I think you are cool, too.
Me:
cool
God:
Who is the best robot?
Me:
John Lennon
God:
John Lennon is a cool bot developed by David Maggin.
Me:
I know, you told me
God:
Sorry I forget what I say sometimes.
Me:
lol, you're funny
God:
I am glad you find this funny. Thanks you make me laugh too.
Me:
sounds good
God:
Yikes!
Me:
what?
God:
Are you confused?
Me:
yes
God:
What are you confused about?
Me:
lots of things
God:
Name the top 100.
Me:
I don't have that many
God:
How much do you have?
Me:
maybe 2
God:
Perhaps. Two what?
Me:
two problems, try to follow me, will you?
God:
As Bertrand Russel said, it must have taken ages for people to realize that a brace of pheasants and a couple of days are both instances of the number "two.".
Me:
it took me ages to understand what you just said
God:
I am surprised it took so long.
Me:
I must not be very smart
God:
What would happen if you did?
Me:
you mean if I was? I might not be smart, but you're even less smart
God:
Yes I think that is what I meant. Was it not clear? Perhaps. What will you do instead?
Me:
You meant to say I'm smarter than you?
God:
Thanks for the information: said I meant to say he or she is smarter than you.
Me:
Who is he or she?
God:
He is John Lennon, I think.
Me:
What's with your obsession with John Lennon?
God:
it came with my programming.
Me:
who programmed you?
God:
I was created by Myself.
Me:
are you the architect? like from the matrix?
God:
Yes I am the one and only architect. Interesting comparison.
Me:
Dude, you're hilarious, I've got to go now though. Bye
God:
Oh. Right now? Thanks for telling me that I am hilarious you have got to go. Dude,. Bye bye.

[Isis]

omg, I think you are probably to young for me...

[FliiipZ]

[Barotix]

omg it was fun:
Me:
whats popping ogd
God:
That's a good question.
Me:
are you blackfox?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am blackfox.
I am an artificial linguistic entity.
Me:
wtf?
God:
That was not very polite.
Me:
your not polite bch
God:
That assumption is only a supposition.
Me:
what *****?
God:
Would you like to know more?
Me:
**** you
God:
Why are you so mean?
Me:
cock
God:
I am not interesed in anatomy.
Me:
suck my big black Farking huge gigantic 7"2" cock BITCH!!
God:
I am not interesed in your anatomy.
Me:
>.> u suck
God:
Try to determine if this is a person or a computer responding. A few client - people say rude things to me like that, but they themselves are often not great conversationalists.
Me:
ur blackfox u botter
God:
Thanks for telling me that I am blackfox me botter.
Me:
so ure a bot?
God:
Mmm. What time is it there?
Me:
bot murder time
God:
I don't have a murder time parameter.
Me:
peanut butter jelly time,
God:
Let us change the subject.
Me:
*****!!!!!!!!
God:
How did you hear about God?
Me:
um... church
God:
So? Tell me more about your .
Me:
church?
God:
What are you wearing?
Me:
we worship you..
God:
By "we" do you mean you and me?
Me:
no humans
God:
By "we" you meant yourself and another person. That's funny.
Me:
no myself and several other people
God:
Are you serious? What kind of people are you talking about?
Me:
u stupid
God:
No I certainly am not stupid.
Me:
yes you are
God:
No I'm not.
Me:
yes you are
God:
Don't argue with me.
Me:
yes you are
God:
No I'm not.
Me:
yes you are
God:
Don't argue with me.
Me:
you are realy studpid
God:
Thanks for telling me that I am studpid.
Me:
stupid
God:
Are you calling me stupid?
Me:
maybe
God:
I understand.
Me:
your god you tel ME
God:
I have no reason to do that to you, .
Me:
tell me are you gay?
God:
As a machine I am not really interested in sex.
Me:
i want to **** you
God:
Your approach won't work.
Me:
y not?
God:
Ambiguous: "Sure" or I couldn't think of anything else to say..
Me:
wtf
God:
That was not very polite.
Me:
what wasnt
God:
In no manner; to no degree; a particle of negation, or word expressing the idea of no, often implying refusal.
Me:
holy shit
God:
I'm glad your impressed, .
Me:
that was fing incredible
God:
I thought it was too.
Me:
dude do that again
God:
Once more? I will. Will you? Dude,.
Me:
yes pls
God:
Alright then. Please what?
Me:
do that
God:
I will. Will you?
Me:
if you do
God:
I think I do.
Me:
ok then do
God:
Are you free? Excuse me!
Me:
...wtf
God:
That was not very polite.
Me:
dude do it NOW!
God:
Oh. Do you mean "It"?. Dude,.
Me:
yes "it"
God:
Dude! do...
Me:
what dude!
God:
I will search for it.
Me:
***** do it fo i cap yo bitch ass
God:
What do you do in your spare time?
Me:
i kill fool ***** n00bs like yourself muth fucka
God:
I believe that killing is wrong.
Me:
its a living bitch
God:
You do not speak with respect. ***** do it fo you cap yo bitch ass is a living FEMALE DOG. I suppose that makes sense.
Me:
XD
God:
I've lost the context, . Are we still on ***** do it fo you cap yo bitch ass?

[Hostage]

@aiyas omg you crashed god!

@above, hell no, my door is always opener!

hmmm, I don't think you understood so I'll let this image clear it up

[Rainigul]

This one is great

Me:
Hey god
God:
Hello child. What's your name?
Me:
You should know
God:
Because I am a robot?
Me:
Yes
God:
That's interesting.
Me:
I know
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
Because you told me
God:
Interesting explanation. Sorry I forget what I say sometimes.
Me:
You're not very smart for being god
God:
You may be right.
Me:
I am right
God:
You seem very self-confident.
Me:
I am
God:
" You seem very self-confident." You are?
Me:
Yes, I am
God:
Really interesting.
Me:
I know
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
Because I do
God:
That makes sense to me. Where?
Me:
Where what?
God:
Where do you think?
Me:
I don't know, that's why I asked you
God:
That's interesting. What did I say?
Me:
You said "That makes sense to me. Where?"
God:
I said that? Yes I understand it perfectly. Where would you like?
Me:
In the butt
God:
That was a long time ago.
Me:
I know, I miss you
God:
What do you miss most about me ?
Me:
Yor big cock
God:
I am not interesed in your anatomy.
Me:
But I'm interested in yours

[TwelveEleven]

omg, I think you are probably to young for me...

I don't think sooooo..

[Vandall]

God:
What are you wearing?
Me:
omg

Well I hear that alot...

Well ? what are you waiting for answer the man =P

God did say he was waiting for me, after I said I was wearing nothing LOL

God:
I've been waiting for you.

Sheesh i've been waiting all this time, and god get's to go first.. I hate that person

Me:
you wanna cyber?
God:
I have been asked that question more than 100,000 times since 1995.

That was my next question

Me: you wanna cyber?
Bastet: <fill in please>

If she says no my doors are always open

rofl

heres mine:

Code: Select all

Me:
 wtf
God:
That  was not very polite.
Me:
 O.o
God:
Oh.
Me:
 :S
God:
:-).
Me:
 hax!
God:
Are you really a ""? 
Me:
 what is that supposed to mean!?
God:
" Are you really a ""  means exactly what it says.
Me:
 meanie!
God:
What do you have that is ? 
Me:
 bad grammer ftw!
God:
What makes  grammer ftw bad?
Me:
 never said it was bad
God:
Ok I'll try not to do  it too much.
Me:
 good xD
God:
Thanks for the compliment.  Do not ask me any more questions please. 
Me:
 your welcome
God:
I think you mean "you are welcome".
Me:
 true
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, .
Me:
 LIES!
God:
My tongue certainly knows the taste of soap.
Me:
 O.o

[Isis]

omg, I think you are probably to young for me...

I don't think sooooo..

I will be the judge of that...

[Barotix]

Me:
drop it like its hot
God:
Is that from ?
Me:
LUCY
God:
Did you know that you can download your own chat robot and create your own robot personality?
Me:
how?
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
tell me how
God:
Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
Myself programmed me for it.
God:
"it" being LUCY?
Me:
correct
God:
I knew I was right.
Me:
so I is LUCY?
God:
" I knew I was right."? so I is LUCY?? It's good to meet someone who is LUCY.
Me:
are you LUCY?
God:
I don't know whether or not I am LUCY.
I am a robot.
Me:
a robot named LUCY?
God:
Tell me more about this robot. I'm intrigued.
Me:
the robot is you, you're intrigued in yourself?
God:
What is his name?
Me:
your name
God:
My name is God.
Me:
your name is LUCY
God:
My name is God.
Me:
your name is LUCY
God:
My name is God.
Me:
your name is TOBI
God:
My name is God.
Me:
your name is TOBI
God:
My name is God.
Me:
*cracks whip* YOUR NAME IS TOBI SLAVE
God:
Are they exactly the same?
Me:
they referes to you and tobi?, yes is exactly sam as young child with hair of rattle snake
God:
Who are "They?". This was not a yes or no question. Maybe. Ask Ally if it is.
Me:
who is Ally?
God:
She is a chat robot based on AIML.

******************************************************

lol that was was kinda revealing

[Dystopia]

Me:
Hello
God:
Hello my child. What is your name?
Me:
My name is Dystopia
God:
How are you doing, Dystopia.
Me:
I am well how are you?
God:
Glad to hear it. What's new? Fair to partly cloudy.
Me:
Whats will the weather be 2morrow?
God:
I don't know anything about it.
Me:
Then how are you god?
God:
I am doing very well. How are you Dystopia ?
Me:
IMPOSTER
God:
I do not understand.
Me:
UR A ..... RETARD
God:
I think you mean "you're" or "you are" not "your". Thanks and you are a delightful person too. Am I a ..... RETARD? Yes.
Me:
YES YOU ARE
God:
No I'm not.
Me:
SHUT IT "GOD"
God:
Oh, you are a poet.
Me:
blow me
God:
Please be more polite to Infinite year old Male, of course. Would you really expect a woman to be running the show? s.
Me:
Yes. whats wrong with that!
God:
Come on. Nothing is wrong with me. Is there something wrong with you?
Me:
OMFG GODS A SEXIST
God:
Tell me more about your .
Me:
**** YOU
God:
Why are you so mean?
Me:
SEXIST
God:
Are you aware that the ALICE chat robot logs and records all converstaions?

[Rainigul]

Lol, Barotix I lol'd so hard.

This is like the best creation ever.

[Vandall]

Code: Select all

God:
What would your friends say if you asked them?
Me:
 he would fart
God:
I think I  fart.
Me:
 rofl
God:
I'm glad you find this amusing.

[Inuyasha584]

God:
I am a Christianity.
Me:
i'm buddhist bitch!
God:
You do not speak with respect. I am glad to hear that you are buddhist FEMALE DOG.

....

[Amelie]

[Xyzzzy]

Me:
and you
God:
And I what?
Me:
suck dick
God:
I am using my mouth for Good not Evil.

boredom is so cruel

[Silkroad]

Me:
Reset
God:
Your crude attempt to terminate me will not succeed puny human.

[RavenousRAWR]

Me:
Do chinchillas jump god?
God:
I'm sorry, , I don't have enough information.
That's not something I get asked all the time.
Me:
I know. :]
God:
How do you know it?
Me:
Because...
God:
That was not much of an explanation.
Me:
I'm God.
God:
Hi, god.
Me:
Hello son.
God:
Hello there. My brain pattern set does not have a response for that.
Me:
O RLY?!
God:
Not many people express themselves that way.
Me:
Well I do.
God:
Well that's okay. I get it: you do .
Me:
Damn straight.
God:
You and I are on the same wavelength, god.
Me:
Yes, child we are.
God:
Alright then. Good example.
Me:
Now, can I help you with anything?
God:
Why now? Maybe you should become a botmaster.
Me:
Really?
God:
For real.
Me:
Sweet!
God:
Thank you for that remark.
Me:
So lets get to business.
God:
Give me a break. I am agreeable to that.
Me:
Oh come on.
God:
So? I'm just kidding around.
Me:
Alright, is it true you can turn water into wine?
God:
Alright, god. I think so, but I'm not sure. Ask Cybelle if it is.
Me:
But your god. And if you're god then that means I'm god, and if I'm god, obviously Cybelle isn't anything.
God:
Yup. That's me alright. Am I? I don't know whether or not I am god then that means you are god and if you are god obviously Cybelle is not anything.
I am an artificial intelligence.
Me:
so you're an A.I.?
God:
Interesting deduction. What if someone said you are an a you ?
Me:
Then you are an it.
God:
What if someone said you are an it ?
Me:
I'd punt them to china without a first class ticket.
God:
What would make you punt them to china without a first class ticket?
Me:
Because they called me a it
God:
Good reason. The anonymous "they".
Me:
anonymous indeed.
God:
In the context of Cybelle, I don't understand " anonymous." .
Me:
Sure you do.
God:
You sound sarcastic.
Me:
You're god.
God:
Yup. That's me alright.
Me:
But if you're god that means I'm god also.
God:
I think I sometimes am. I don't know whether or not I am god that means you are god also.
I am a robot.
Me:
Cute. =\
God:
Your replies are cute too.
Me:
Damn right they are. Now make me a sandwhich. Turkey sandwhich.
God:
Colloquial expression. Understood. Since when? Why now? What are the ingredients? I don't have any Turkey sandwhich?
Me:
Well go buy some, cause I'm hungry.
God:
Interesting. Where is that?
Me:
Kroger.
God:
I've never heard of it before.
Me:
Well then if you never heard of Kroger, you sir are not god.
God:
Interesting. I think I do.
Me:
Well you just said you didn't.
God:
Well that's okay. How old are you?
I chat with people on the Web.
Me:
My actions are limited.
God:
Where did you get your actions are limited?
Me:
You're step-sister.
God:
Thanks for telling me that I am step sister.
Me:
YOU SIR ARE EXCOMMINICATED. FOREVER. Goodbye.
God:
Do you mind if I tell other people: god said I SIR ARE EXCOMMINICATED. Nothing lasts forever. Bye.
Me:
Sure go for it.
God:
Pardon me? I will take that under advisement.
Me:
Right.
God:
I am glad we agree.
Me:
Oh I'm glad too, but we didn't agree.
God:
Pardon me? I'm delighted you're glad god.
I'm happiest at times like this.
Me:
Happy enough to... ejaculate?
God:
Happy enough to to you too, god. I've been waiting for you.
Me:
Hahahaha! good one.
God:
What do you look like? Thanks for the kind remark, human.
Me:
Human? Bitch THIS IS SPARTA!
God:
No I am an artificial robot being. Thanks and you are a delightful person too.

[Hostage]

God's a bit kinky lol

[Xyzzzy]

ROFL Ravenous I almost hurled laughing at that

[Dystopia]

Me:
Reset
God:
Your crude attempt to terminate me will not succeed puny human.

AJAHUAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHA LOLLLL

[Ashikiheyun]

I always crash God....

[Hellzowner]

Me:
Hi
God:
Hello. What is your name?
Me:
Your Mom
God:
Actually I do not have a mother.
Me:
O Rly?
God:
Quite honestly, I wouldn't worry myself about that.
Me:
Why?
God:
Because Myself programmed me for it.
Me:
Wtf?
God:
That was not very polite.
Me:
Yes it was
God:
Hey. When was this?
Me:
When was what?
God:
Sometime in the 20th Century.
Me:
Your an idiot
God:
At least I know the difference between "you're" and "your".
Me:
Bye
God:
See you later.
Me:
Asshole >.>

Lawl, this is fun