Essex Girls...

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Isis
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Essex Girls...

Post by Isis »

Most brits know what an Essex Girl is.. But I would like to share with the forum some jokes about the Essex Girl...

Q: What's an Essex girls favorite wine?
A: aw go-on take me to lakeside please please go-on take me
Q: What's an Essex Girls form of protection?
A: Bus Shelters
Q: What's the difference between an Essex Girl and a Bag of Crisps?
A: You only get one bang out of a bag of crisps
Q: How may Essex girls does it take to make chocolate chip cookies?.
A: Five. One to make the mixture and Four to peel the Smarties.
Q: What's the difference between an Essex girl and a washing machine?
A: A washing machine doesn't follow you around for weeks after you've dumped your load in it.
Q: What does an Essex girl say after sex?
A: "Do you really all play for the same football team?"
Q: What's the difference between an Essex girl and an ironing board?
A: An ironing boards legs are difficult to part.
Q: What's the difference between an Essex girl and an Essex boy?
A: An Essex girl has a higher sperm count.
Q: What does an Essex girl put behind her ears to make her more attractive?
A: Her feet.
Q: What is the difference between an Essex girl and a plate of spaghetti?
A: Spaghetti moves when you eat it.
Q: What does an Essex girl do with her asshole after sex?
A: She takes him down the pub.
Q: What makes an Essex girls eyes light up?
A: A torch shone in her ear.
Q: How do you know when an Essex girl's had an orgasm?
A: She drops her bag of chips.
Q: What is the difference between an Essex girl and the Titanic?
A: Only 1500 went down on the Titanic.
Q: What is the difference between a supermarket trolley and an Essex girl?
A: A supermarket trolley has a mind of it's own.
An Essex girl is driving along and asks her boyfriend to kiss her somewhere warm, wet and smelly.
He tells her that it's to late to drive to Canvey Island.
Q: What do an Essex girl and President Gorbachev have in common?
A: They both get farked by eight men on holiday.
Q: Why do Essex Girls wear knickers?
A: To keep their ankles warm
Q: How does an Essex girl get light?
A: Open a car door.
Q: How does an Essex girl turn the light off after sex?
A: She closes the car door
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cin

Re: Essex Girls...

Post by cin »

Bastet wrote:Q: What is the difference between an Essex girl and a plate of spaghetti?

Q: What is the difference between a supermarket trolley and an Essex girl?
A: A supermarket trolley has a mind of it's own.[/b]

classic. better than blondes jokes :D
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Zypher
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Post by Zypher »

i guess i have been looking for sloots in the wrong places
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Stress
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Post by Stress »

Very funny stuff indeed :)
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StealMySoda
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Post by StealMySoda »

I remember I used to find the fact that essex had the word sex in it so funny when I was younger.
Ooh, I got a sexy ex-staff title!
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gamef
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Post by gamef »

Hey dont talk about my girls like that. :P

Essex Ftw!!!
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iBilly
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Post by iBilly »

I live in Romford, and I'm a bigger slut than any of the girls around here.
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Isis
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Post by Isis »

iBilly wrote:I live in Romford, and I'm a bigger slut than any of the girls around here.


I'm an Essex Girl...
But I've known girls like that..
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cin

Post by cin »

Bastet wrote:I'm an Essex Girl...

<3
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Priam
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Post by Priam »

Q: What is the difference between an Essex girl and the Titanic?
A: Only 1500 went down on the Titanic.


<3 <3
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gamef
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Post by gamef »

iBilly wrote:I live in Romford, and I'm a bigger slut than any of the girls around here.


I live in Ilford. :shock:
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Blackchocob0
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Post by Blackchocob0 »

Bastet wrote:
iBilly wrote:I live in Romford, and I'm a bigger slut than any of the girls around here.


I'm an Essex Girl...
But I've known girls like that..

Ah so that explains it. :)
Peace.
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Isis
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Post by Isis »

Blackchocob0 wrote:
Bastet wrote:
iBilly wrote:I live in Romford, and I'm a bigger slut than any of the girls around here.


I'm an Essex Girl...
But I've known girls like that..

Ah so that explains it. :)


hehe.. explains what??
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Nuklear
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Post by Nuklear »

HAHA!
Now I understand...
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Rainigul
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Post by Rainigul »

Lol, they were all so badass.

Classics.
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Sylhana
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Post by Sylhana »

Bastet wrote:
Blackchocob0 wrote:
Bastet wrote:
iBilly wrote:I live in Romford, and I'm a bigger slut than any of the girls around here.


I'm an Essex Girl...
But I've known girls like that..

Ah so that explains it. :)


hehe.. explains what??


xD

On topic: Funny jokes, hvnt read these for a while now.
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iBilly
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Post by iBilly »

gamef wrote:
iBilly wrote:I live in Romford, and I'm a bigger slut than any of the girls around here.


I live in Ilford. :shock:


Ilford sucks. :twisted:
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Post by Bozza »

Lol --> very funny :D
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witchcraft
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Re: Essex Girls...

Post by witchcraft »

I was going through some old threads and thought these jokes were funny.
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satman83
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Re: Essex Girls...

Post by satman83 »

talk about resurrection from beyond the grave :shock: :shock:
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maxietheboss
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Re: Essex Girls...

Post by maxietheboss »

Lol, i have seen worse resurrections :roll:. Still funny jokes though
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Doron
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Re: Essex Girls...

Post by Doron »

finally a reseruction that was actually worth it...
Priam wrote:Q: What is the difference between an Essex girl and the Titanic?
A: Only 1500 went down on the Titanic.


<3 <3


<3 <3 <3
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Re: Essex Girls...

Post by Skatman »

Q: How does an Essex girl get light?
A: Open a car door.
Q: How does an Essex girl turn the light off after sex?
A: She closes the car door


i rofl'd
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LockStar.
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Re: Essex Girls...

Post by LockStar. »

BAHAHAHAHA :love:
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crazyskwrls
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Re:

Post by crazyskwrls »

Bastet wrote:
I'm an Essex Girl...


that explains it! :D
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thnx Kraq
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huejas
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Re: Essex Girls...

Post by huejas »

Bastet wrote:Q: What's the difference between an Essex girl and an Essex boy?
A: An Essex girl has a higher sperm count.

Thats my fav :love: Gonna change it up a bit and us it on ppl :P :twisted:
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Dark Shifty
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Re: Essex Girls...

Post by Dark Shifty »

oh boy. you are a funny one. i found myself laughing out loud reading that.
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Isis
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Re:

Post by Isis »

Blackchocob0 wrote:
Bastet wrote:
iBilly wrote:I live in Romford, and I'm a bigger slut than any of the girls around here.


I'm an Essex Girl...
But I've known girls like that..

Ah so that explains it. :)


crazyskwrls wrote:
Bastet wrote:
I'm an Essex Girl...


that explains it! :D


I think that has already been used in this thread :wink:
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Snoopy
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Re:

Post by Snoopy »

iBilly wrote:I live in Romford, and I'm a bigger slut than any of the girls around here.


Pics?
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Priam
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Re: Essex Girls...

Post by Priam »

essex girl + Chav boy = One huge seperated family.
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