Dumbass Thief

Anything else. Post a funny site or tell us about yourself. Discuss current events or whatever else you want. Post off topic threads here.
Post Reply
/Pi
Senior Member
Posts: 4590
Joined: Fri May 18, 2007 3:49 am
Quick Reply: Yes
Location: Off Topic

Dumbass Thief

Post by /Pi »

Foiled by Facebook: Would-Be Burglar Jonathan Parker
Share

By Stephen Kral on September 17, 2009

In the annals of dumb thieves doing dumb things, this dude may as well be king. Or close to. Here’s the story.

19-year-old Jonathan Parker appeared in court earlier this week for felony-level charges of robbery, after, allegedly, stealing two diamond rings from a neighbor in his home state of Pennsylvania. So far, not exactly an uncommon account: kid wants some money, likely can’t find a job, so he decides to steal. Unfortunate, but it happens. Now, according to reports, Parker was not caught mid-robbery and so far the diamond rings have not been found, yet the case seems to be closed already. Why you ask? What CSI-level work did the police pull out?

Well, apparently after successfully picking up both diamond rings, Jonathan Parker then decided to check his Facebook account, you know see what was going on. A new message from the girl he likes, perhaps? Anyway, time was of the essence, I guess, so he checked it at the house. It was midday, owners away at their jobs, why not? We’ll call this mistake number one. Now for mistake number two, Parker then leaves, but forgets to log out of his account! Oops.

Yeah, now we’re getting somewhere. But that’s not all. After police picked him up as the lead suspect (I wonder why?), they started asking around too. And Parker’s “friend” let them know that Parker had asked him the night before the robbery if he had wanted to help out. Yep. His “friend.” Mistake number three. Looks like Jonathan Parker is now, officially, out.

Bail is set at $10,000 and if convicted – a big if indeed – he’ll face up to 10 years prison time. But hey! Maybe there’s Facebook in prison now? Might not be so bad after all.


Source: http://www.manolith.com/2009/09/17/foil ... an-parker/

User avatar
Mirosuke
Forum Legend
Posts: 6735
Joined: Fri Aug 22, 2008 5:30 am
Quick Reply: Yes
Location: Love the way you are.

Re: Dumbass Thief

Post by Mirosuke »

What an Asshole.
( ๏̯͡ ๏ ) ~
Hwang Mi Hee(L)
あなた運命を全うする
ImageImageImage
WE WANT [ TORCHLIGHT II], [TERA ONLINE], [BLADE&SOUL] AND... [DIABLO III].


~* Old Sigs *~
[x][x][x][x]

User avatar
TheDrop
Forum Legend
Posts: 7150
Joined: Wed May 07, 2008 1:37 am
Quick Reply: Yes
Location: uefa2012

Re: Dumbass Thief

Post by TheDrop »

what a dumbass.
let it gooooo let it gooooOoOooOOOOOO

Let her suck my pistol
She open up her mouth and then I blow her brains out
Image

User avatar
Devilman
Active Member
Posts: 531
Joined: Sat Nov 29, 2008 10:13 am
Quick Reply: Yes
Location: Venus

Re: Dumbass Thief

Post by Devilman »

damn that is one heck of an idiot...
Image
Thanks to Nelson12 from www.gamesforum.com for this awesome sig
_______
"It's only cheating if you get caught"

User avatar
Thomas42
Active Member
Posts: 906
Joined: Wed Jun 18, 2008 6:30 am
Quick Reply: Yes
Location: Budapest, Hungary

Re: Dumbass Thief

Post by Thomas42 »

Why do such people exist? Why? WHY?!
Image
The best way out - is through.

User avatar
SM-Count
Ex-Staff
Posts: 2761
Joined: Sat Jan 12, 2008 7:02 pm
Quick Reply: Yes
Location: /wave

Re: Dumbass Thief

Post by SM-Count »

I need to change my profile: I am... "robbing my neighbor's house, sry, don't have time to tweet it as well."

User avatar
woutR
Elite Member
Posts: 5573
Joined: Wed Feb 08, 2006 5:20 pm
Quick Reply: Yes
Location: Netherlands
Contact:

Re: Dumbass Thief

Post by woutR »

10 years for 2 diamond rings, jesus. The punishments are really low in the Netherlands, but 10 years for this? Not a bit extreme?
I doubt you'd get more than a couple of months or a year tops for that in the Netherlands.
Image

<< :giveup:>>

User avatar
*BlackFox
Forum Legend
Posts: 7921
Joined: Wed Sep 03, 2008 12:55 pm
Quick Reply: Yes
Location: Off Topic

Re: Dumbass Thief

Post by *BlackFox »

OMFG, that thief is a freakin dumbass!
Image

User avatar
DarkJackal
Elite Member
Posts: 6119
Joined: Mon Feb 20, 2006 7:23 pm
Quick Reply: Yes
Location: A den~
Contact:

Re: Dumbass Thief

Post by DarkJackal »

Yea thats pretty stupid. He should of taken the computer ;d.

Or yea, not use it.
Image

User avatar
*BlackFox
Forum Legend
Posts: 7921
Joined: Wed Sep 03, 2008 12:55 pm
Quick Reply: Yes
Location: Off Topic

Re: Dumbass Thief

Post by *BlackFox »

DarkJackal wrote:He should of taken the computer ;d.
I think doing so would be a mistake “number four”.. xD
Image

User avatar
Thomas42
Active Member
Posts: 906
Joined: Wed Jun 18, 2008 6:30 am
Quick Reply: Yes
Location: Budapest, Hungary

Re: Dumbass Thief

Post by Thomas42 »

^
Stealing comp > leaving dox on it
imo
Image
The best way out - is through.

User avatar
Melez
Veteran Member
Posts: 3009
Joined: Thu Jul 10, 2008 10:22 am
Location: лол шта
Contact:

Re: Dumbass Thief

Post by Melez »

woutR wrote:10 years for 2 diamond rings, jesus. The punishments are really low in the Netherlands, but 10 years for this? Not a bit extreme?
I doubt you'd get more than a couple of months or a year tops for that in the Netherlands.


Exactly the same in here, there was a case where a guy threw a molotov into my uncle's cafe burning the whole place. There were no casualties, but the guy got only two months!
My opinion: He got the 10 years and deserved them right. Throughout his jail time he'll think over what he did for the past 10 years and if he will lay a finger on diamonds again.
Image

User avatar
Swindler
Forum God
Posts: 11256
Joined: Tue Apr 10, 2007 7:49 am
Quick Reply: Yes
Location: Pimpas Paradise.

Re: Dumbass Thief

Post by Swindler »

Clever thief is clever.

User avatar
Toshiharu
Senior Member
Posts: 4222
Joined: Fri Feb 15, 2008 1:55 am
Quick Reply: Yes
Location: Nowhere

Re: Dumbass Thief

Post by Toshiharu »

brb tweeting that I got arrested for robbing.
Image
Image
If being a loser means not playing Silkroad all day.. lulwut?

Post Reply

Return to “Off Topic Lounge”