poetry - voices among me

[Shaka Laka]

Hello guys, I want everyone's opinion about this piece my little brother wrote. He is 14 years old and is hearing impaired. I am trying to inspire him to write more poetry. I truly believe he has a gift, and plan on putting him on some kind of a paper for the public to see.


Voices Among Me

I stand there concentrating
To the words I hear
But the voices around me
Are upsetting my ear

I feel troubled inside
I feel the need to scream
Distractions around me
Water down a stream

Hysterical inside
I wanted to flee
The man's voice I can't hear
His mouth movement I see

[Psychedeelic]

wow nice for a 14 year old, keep inspiring him, I believe he will get better and better

[*BlackFox]

It wasn't bad at all!

[Squirt]

The poem is good for a 14 year old.

Your going for the whole deal? As in 15 years we'll see the movie of how a deaf boy became the greatest poet of his time?

[Shaka Laka]

Thank you very much for the positve feedback. This will help us more I will post some more poems later.

[Kirkaldi]

Nice poem, I can't even do something like that.

[.Banshee]

Wow nice poem. It has such a smooth flow and I can feel all the anguish in it. WOW tell him great job for me.

[Vinyl]

Thanks for putting the stuff up, bro. Thanks for the positive comments guys, it's cool that you like my stuff.

[aznronin]

wow that was nice