Ever been caught jerkin' it?

[l05tfr33k7]

Seriously, why do people want to know this kind of shit?

shows just what kind of open-minded world we live in

[Dark Shifty]

girl friend FTW

[magisuns]

I use a parental block

[Alterran]

well i was on the couch doing stuff and then i dint hear the car pull up and they open teh door so i think i got 5 secs to get my pants up so i ran out back and on the way stubbed my toe which hurt like hell but ive never been caught been close a lot thou

[BrokenSaint]

......meh.

[Grimm-.-]

LOL I love topics like these...So damn funny xD!!!

Buuuuut OT:...
I have a lock on my door but sometimes I forgot or think *Ehh, No one will come run in, I'll be quick..-.-*

...Yeah...Im wrong sometimes.

[Breed]

hahaha.
Never.
I'm too damn sly.

[heroo]

really...

[takolin]

<@Chin^> My sister caught me jacking off the other week and calls me a pervert
<@Chin^> just the other day i walked into my room and caught my sister masturbating
<@Chin^> So she calls me a pervert again?!?
<@Chin^> there is no justice in the world...

<drmason> there was this one time I was wanking to porn...
<drmason> ... I kept a javascript tutorial open in another window so my parents didn't start wondering why I was always on the desktop with no windows showing
<drmason> so I'm just about to splurge when I suddenly hear my dad coming up the stairs
<drmason> alt-tabbed to the other window and tried to pull my boxers up... computer stalled JUST THEN as my dad was opening the door
<drmason> I just stood up and was like "****... dad this honestly isn't what it looks like"
<drmason> and he glanced at the screen and said "I sure hope so because it looks like you're masturbating to a Farking javascript tutorial"

<Charlesowns> Man i was surfin porn and like "normal" surfin at the same time, so my mom comes in and i quick as hell tab down the porn. So now im looking at a SWAT vest and an Mp5 submachinegun trying to hide the giant penis in my pants. Then all of a sudden this realy gay male voice speaks out realy loud goin "i want to suck your big dick ans swallow your hot sperm" then like 100 popups open up all consisting of hardcore fetish gayporn.
<Charlesowns> man my mom started crying and now she thinks im gay... it owns

^Thanks to bash.org.

Never been caught. I <3 locks.

[Starrie]

<drmason> there was this one time I was wanking to porn...
<drmason> ... I kept a javascript tutorial open in another window so my parents didn't start wondering why I was always on the desktop with no windows showing
<drmason> so I'm just about to splurge when I suddenly hear my dad coming up the stairs
<drmason> alt-tabbed to the other window and tried to pull my boxers up... computer stalled JUST THEN as my dad was opening the door
<drmason> I just stood up and was like "****... dad this honestly isn't what it looks like"
<drmason> and he glanced at the screen and said "I sure hope so because it looks like you're masturbating to a Farking javascript tutorial"

LOL Gave me a good laugh

[Pan_Raider(`_´)]

<drmason> there was this one time I was wanking to porn...
<drmason> ... I kept a javascript tutorial open in another window so my parents didn't start wondering why I was always on the desktop with no windows showing
<drmason> so I'm just about to splurge when I suddenly hear my dad coming up the stairs
<drmason> alt-tabbed to the other window and tried to pull my boxers up... computer stalled JUST THEN as my dad was opening the door
<drmason> I just stood up and was like "****... dad this honestly isn't what it looks like"
<drmason> and he glanced at the screen and said "I sure hope so because it looks like you're masturbating to a Farking javascript tutorial"

LOL Gave me a good laugh

if such cool parents would exist

[Tasdik]

*jerks it while reading this topic and his mom walks in*
OH CRUD!!!!!

[Love]

there are certain things people should keep to themselves nuff, this should be rename the no so bright thread

[/Pi]

[Burningwolf]

by my sister lol
she caught we watching lesbian porn while doing it xD
she then just said
i saw nothing!

[Tasdik]

by my sister lol
she caught we watching lesbian porn while doing it xD
she then just said
i saw nothing!

*awkward*

[Grimm-.-]

by my sister lol
she caught we watching lesbian porn while doing it xD
she then just said
i saw nothing!

*awkward*

*Turtle*

[theblindarcher]

by my sister lol
she caught we watching lesbian porn while doing it xD
she then just said
i saw nothing!

*awkward*

*Turtle*

*strange*

[Defyance™]

by my sister lol
she caught we watching lesbian porn while doing it xD
she then just said
i saw nothing!

*awkward*

*Turtle*

*Climax*

[Snoopy]

!LOCKS FTW!

[dom]

yep my sister and her freind walked in on me lol i was so imperissed

i bet it got pretty steamy right afterwards

if it was me, i would have asked them to join in

but since it was me, that wouldn't be my sister so it would be ok.

I would of asked too, even if it was your sister.

[Dystopia]

Let me set something straight here...

--

For the people that are saying this is an immature topic, it doesn't make you look mature or smart, it just shows how badly you try to show others that your "grown up" and that in my books is just pathetic

If you think this is "a gross children's topic", actually its little kids who get the feeling in their stomach when a sexual related topics arise, so if its gross in your eyes, please rephrase it to "gross grown-up topic imo" and don't big your-self up.

I'll tell you that a good percent of men, and women masturbate over 90% for sure, its completely healthy, natural and normal.

For those who don't masturbate, you are either very religious, stupid, haven't hit puberty or have an extremely horny girlfriend.

A good percentage of these people who do masturbate, wouldn't liked to be walked in on while doing so, or have and we all know it would be pretty awkward or weird, so im just asking for some past experiences.

So this is a completely legit non-OTL-puberty-hitting thread.

[dom]

Let me set something straight here...

--

For the people that are saying this is an immature topic, it doesn't make you look mature or smart, it just shows how badly you try to show others that your "grown up" and that in my books is just pathetic

If you think this is "a gross children's topic", actually its little kids who get the feeling in their stomach when a sexual related topics arise, so if its gross in your eyes, please rephrase it to "gross grown-up topic imo" and don't big your-self up.

I'll tell you that a good percent of men, and women masturbate over 90% for sure, its completely healthy, natural and normal.

For those who don't masturbate, you are either very religious, stupid, haven't hit puberty or have an extremely horny girlfriend.

A good percentage of these people who do masturbate, wouldn't liked to be walked in on while doing so, or have and we all know it would be pretty awkward or weird, so im just asking for some past experiences.

So this is a completely legit non-OTL-puberty-hitting thread.

Want to talk about techniques? I can make a video tutorial.

[Grimm-.-]

Let me set something straight here...

--

For the people that are saying this is an immature topic, it doesn't make you look mature or smart, it just shows how badly you try to show others that your "grown up" and that in my books is just pathetic

If you think this is "a gross children's topic", actually its little kids who get the feeling in their stomach when a sexual related topics arise, so if its gross in your eyes, please rephrase it to "gross grown-up topic imo" and don't big your-self up.

I'll tell you that a good percent of men, and women masturbate over 90% for sure, its completely healthy, natural and normal.

For those who don't masturbate, you are either very religious, stupid, haven't hit puberty or have an extremely horny girlfriend.

A good percentage of these people who do masturbate, wouldn't liked to be walked in on while doing so, or have and we all know it would be pretty awkward or weird, so im just asking for some past experiences.

So this is a completely legit non-OTL-puberty-hitting thread.

I like you.[no homo]

...@ Dom. *Yeah*

[Grandpa]

Let me set something straight here...
...
I'll tell you that a good percent of men, and women masturbate over 90% for sure, its completely healthy, natural and normal.

One slight correction:
Statistics (consensus) show 90% of male population -AND- 65% of the female population.

Nobody is certain though. Not only is there a stronger taboo against female masturbation, there's also a taboo against talking about it. No doubt for some women (and some men) talking about sex can also be awkward so shyness, as you mentioned, may be another though lesser factor. I know of know studies on gender based shyness but would think that this too could be considered.

"Go ask Alice" website wrote:

"blame-it-on-masturbation" reasoning is understandable. If one sprouts hair in "strange" places, sports dark circles under the eyes, and says goodbye to those always reliable erections during and after stretches of solo-sex, one could easily conclude that these unwanted reactions came on as a result of whacking off. Then, could it not also be said that hair loss, far-sightedness, and love handles also owe it to masturbation? And what about greater self-confidence, career changes, and the urge to buy property? The point: is it possible that all of these occurrences stem from something besides genital stimulation? Might aging also be the culprit?

Heliopolis was the cult center for Re, or Ra, the sun god. In Heliopolitan myth, Re as Atum was the creator of the universe. Self-existent and alone, Atum brought forth–either through an act of masturbation or by means of spittle–the divine pair of Shu, air, and Tefnut, moisture. From their union sprang the earth god Geb and the sky goddess Nut.

Dont'cha love it?

For my part age is a factor (thankfully).


~Grandpa

[Grimm-.-]

Let me set something straight here...
...
I'll tell you that a good percent of men, and women masturbate over 90% for sure, its completely healthy, natural and normal.

One slight correction:
Statistics (consensus) show 90% of male population -AND- 65% of the female population.

Nobody is certain though. Not only is there a stronger taboo against female masturbation, there's also a taboo against talking about it. No doubt for some women (and some men) talking about sex can also be awkward so shyness, as you mentioned, may be another though lesser factor. I know of know studies on gender based shyness but would think that this too could be considered.

Heliopolis was the cult center for Re, or Ra, the sun god. In Heliopolitan myth, Re as Atum was the creator of the universe. Self-existent and alone, Atum brought forth–either through an act of masturbation or by means of spittle–the divine pair of Shu, air, and Tefnut, moisture. From their union sprang the earth god Geb and the sky goddess Nut.

Dont'cha love it?

~Grandpa

lol...
Why exactly did you make your name Grandpa...?

[Grandpa]

Why exactly did you make your name Grandpa...?

I have 4 grandkids (with another due in June), am semi-retired and it (being a gramps) is a big part of who I am (now). My previous most recent internal identification 'mark' was "Single-dad" because the kids mom deserted when my youngest (now 21 years) was three (2), two weeks before his birthday. My online pseudonym then was 'SparHawk' and sometimes 'Sparrowhawke'.

The last MMORPG I played extensively was WOW and I had a char there named "Grandmére" who was a Paladin with a huge HAMMER. 'She' loved to go around and provoke mages (especially Gnomes) into fights then taunt them, "You were beat down by a granny!"

I (like many others) am in transition again.

[Grimm-.-]

Interesting...

I Thought It was just because you were very knowledgeble But now i see why.^^

Grats on the 5th Grandkid

[Grandpa]

Thank you kindly, Grimm.
If this topic were called 'embarrassing things of a sexual nature' I'd mention that it isn't so much being caught, but the tricks your body plays that really do it. Everybody is warned about growing hair 'in strange places' prior to puberty. Nobody warns a fellow about turning gray 'down there'. They oughta warn a guy. Felt like my body betrayed me and like I was being personally violated by death itself...

[Grimm-.-]

Well...I havent thought of that one.

You can always get some black hair die.
I thought it might be cool to have Jet black pubes lol....

All I can say is that you cant fight your age.
So eveyone will go through similer situations.
:/