Jangan, South Gate
Mangyang Champ (William): Morning boys, hows the world?
Mangyang (Edward): Not good
W: Whats wrong? The sun is shining, its all wonderful!
E: Its raining. And that D8 sun bower in a cape is killing everything outside of Jg south regardless of their level. Hes a twat.
W: Shiny sun bow though. Sun is shining.
E: Twat.
W: Right. Anyway. That all thats bothering you?
E: No
Phillip was brutally murdered last night
W: OMG! NO!
E: I know
W: But he was such a nice boy, funny, caring. Man, he was even so attractive that he was a model for Abercrombie & Fitch, and Rogues wouuld come and make masks of him to look like him, but it never went to his head, who would do such a thing?!
E: I don't know, but as soon as I found out, I called the police.
W: Police?
E: Well, its a Yeoha from over the bridge
W:
E: He watches a lot of Columbo.
W: I see.
E: He rides around on his turtle shouting nee-naw-nee-naw, but other than that I'm sure he's fine.
W: Of course.
E: I set up a meeting for him and you at East gate after lunch
W: Good lad Edward.
After lunch, Jangan, East Gate
W: Good afternoon officer
Officer Yeoha (camp voice): Helloooooo my darling. How are you on this most fabulous afternoon?
W: Er. Not good, one of my most loyal fighters has been brutally murdered -_-
O: Oh golly, of course. I'm so very sorry. I'll get right to work. *walks off then suddenly turns round in a Columbo-esque manner* But can I ask you. Did you do it?
W: No
O: Right. No. Yes silly me. I'll have to take statements from alllll of your boys. Where might I find those delightful hunks of straw?
W: *annoyed by the moron* *growls* Fields. Practicin their fightin against L1 players.
O: Oh wonderful! I loooove that D1 fashion, its just soooo retro!
W: *growls*
O: I'll report back to you tomorrow morning darling. Ciao!
W: *growls*
Mid-story note to readers. I don't know where this is going >_<
The next morning. Jangan, South gate
E: Sir?
W: Yes Edward?
E: Do we know the identity of the killer yet?
W: Not yet son, that ponce is comin back to me this morning
E: Sir! You can't say that! It's politically incorrect!
W: What shall I say then?
E: Testosteronally Challanged.
W: O_O
E: *nods*
W: Hes a nancy-boy
O: Ooooooooooh whos got a fancy toy? That sounds soooo much fun *giggles with innuendo*
W: *growls*
O: Moooooorning gentlemen. I have news on that poor poor Phillip.
W: Go on.
O: Well, having thoroughly questioned your boys, boh mentally and physically ^__^, and from what they saw, I established a timeline of events.
E & W listen
O: Phillip was on his way to bed after dinner, as he had work the next morning. And by the way, doesnt he look just scrumptious in these photos?!
W: *growls angrily, calls someone on his phone while still listening*
O: Annyyyway, he was on his way home, and he met an L1 player, who attacked him. As was his duty he fought him and put up a good fight, but was sadly paralyzed.
O: Someone came along and ressed him, which Phillip was most grateful for. So in his injured state he walked to his door. But then he heard someone shouting "NOOOOOOOB. 100k critical? NOOOOB NOOOOOB"
O: Then someone coloured red and all with horns. ooooh horny man. Ilike that hehe.
W: *puts down the phone and grins savagely*
O: Anyway this fellow turned out to have a sosun bow, and in his zerked state he fired his strongest hit on poor Phillip and hit a critical. I'm told he took a screenshot in order to post it on SRF highest damage topic.
E: So... S..S..Someone killed him just to get a high score?
O: It would appear so yes
E: Sir, what can we do? That twat is still here, in the cape
W: Its ok. I can del with him.
E: Sir?
W: But first, I would suggest you leave Officer. You annoyed me immensely and I called a friend to deal with you, but you helped so I give you a minute to run.
O: Run?! Oh my noooo, I just looooooove it here. I might even get a little cottage, plan an extension, find a woooonderful handsome builder to build it, and ill sit in the garden with some cocktails and...
*O suddenly drops dead, and a rogue appears behind him*
E: wtf?!?!
W: Edward, I'd like you to meet my friend. Pogue.
E: Pogue the Rogue?
W: Yes, don't tease him about it, he was very angry with his parents for it. ts partly why hes always so damn violent.
E: Er, Nice to meet you mr Pogue Sir.
*Pogue stands there, saying nothing, just looking hard. Like Vinny Jones would if he was a Rogue. Called Pogue*
W: Pogue my good man. See that sun bower over there? Hes the fellow.
*Pogue walks toward him*
E: *whispers to W* Won't he get hammered? Those look just like +5 daggers, and thats a sun bow. sun!!
W: He'll be fine son, euro characters are ridiculously overpowered, and make mincemeat out of poorly geared up chinese people.
*Pogue turns invisible*
E:
thats. so. cool.
*Pogue does some crazy rogue shit and kills the sun bower*
Sun Bower: Noooooooob only 20k? You so weak, Noooooob Nooooob Noooooob.
*E and W go to Jangan tomb with the other mangyangs and Phillip's friends for his burial*
*Pogue goes to dispense more rogueish justice elsewhere*
*All the caped players go to DW*
Sun Bower (still dead on floor): Where you all going? Scared?! Nooooobs Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooobs Nooo
*disconnected from server*
Cerberus is still yet to spawn. Bastard dog.
