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sad news about santa ='(

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 10:38 am
by JoshPoshMosh
1. There are approximately 2 billion children in the world. Since Santa does not visit Muslim, Hindu, Jewish, or Buddhist children, this reduces the workload to 15 per cent of the total, or 378 million. At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that comes to 108 million homes.

2. Thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, Santa has about 31 hours to work with. This works out to 967.7 visits per second and a total trip of 75.5 million miles. So Santa's sleigh has to move at 650 miles per second.

3. Assuming that each child gets only a medium-sized Lego set (2lb), the sleigh is carrying more than 500,000 tons. A reindeer can pull no more than 300lb. Even if the "flying" reindeer could pull ten times that, Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload another 54,000 tons.

4. 600,000 tons travelling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance. The lead pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each; they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporized within 4.26 thousands of a second, or about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip. Not that it matters, however, since Santa would be subjected to centrifugal forces of 17,500 Gs. A 250lb Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015lb of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs.


5. Therefore if Santa did exist, he's dead now.

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 10:40 am
by Panu
Santa is :shock:

way to kill my dreams ... jerk

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 10:46 am
by Craftsterious
:roll: oh my .maybe there is two santa or more :wink:

But say santa are dead never in your dreams

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 10:48 am
by Priam
loll! good read

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 11:23 am
by Key-J
Hahaha.

The first couple of paragraphs i was like. Meh, hear it before. The second to last one did it for me!

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 11:25 am
by DeathScar
Santa cant die, he's magical!

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 11:59 am
by Vandango
Image

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 12:27 pm
by Crumpets
Craftsterious wrote::roll: oh my .maybe there is two santa or more :wink:

But say santa are dead never in your dreams


You should dress up in a naughty elf suit, dance and then tape it.

Be such a sexy fox.

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 12:31 pm
by Priam
Crumpets wrote:
Craftsterious wrote::roll: oh my .maybe there is two santa or more :wink:

But say santa are dead never in your dreams


You should dress up in a naughty elf suit, dance and then tape it.

Be such a sexy fox.


+1

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 12:58 pm
by Craftsterious
Crumpets wrote:
Craftsterious wrote::roll: oh my .maybe there is two santa or more :wink:

But say santa are dead never in your dreams


You should dress up in a naughty elf suit, dance and then tape it.

Be such a sexy fox.


hehehehehe . :roll:

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 1:00 pm
by XemnasXD
d-dead....then whose lap was i sitting on :shock: oh god...i need a drink... :oops:

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 2:55 pm
by heroo
lol, very nice :p, only one thing, maybe stupid but what does lb mean? how many kilo is a lb?

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 2:57 pm
by Waisha
heroo wrote:lol, very nice :p, only one thing, maybe stupid but what does lb mean? how many kilo is a lb?

Short for pound I think. It's almost half a kilo I think. It's an british invention, I think.

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 2:58 pm
by heroo
Waisha wrote:
heroo wrote:lol, very nice :p, only one thing, maybe stupid but what does lb mean? how many kilo is a lb?

Short for pound I think. It's almost half a kilo I think. It's an british invention, I think.


ahh yeah i know what pound is, but didn't know lb was a short for pound.

thx.

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 9:16 pm
by DMX
thats why santa is magic :)

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 9:25 pm
by Reise
This was cool 4 years ago.

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 9:49 pm
by ColourBlind
Karlos Vandango wrote:Image

OMG :!: SOOOO KUTE :P

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 10:07 pm
by PB_and_J
Good read.

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 10:12 pm
by chickenfeather
Crumpets wrote:
Craftsterious wrote::roll: oh my .maybe there is two santa or more :wink:

But say santa are dead never in your dreams


You should dress up in a naughty elf suit, dance and then tape it.

Be such a sexy fox.


http://www.elfyourself.com/

Posted: Mon Dec 10, 2007 10:29 pm
by Sylhana
Sigh.

You made me :cry:

Re: sad news about santa ='(

Posted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 12:05 am
by Inuyasha584
JoshPoshMosh wrote:

he's dead now.
i shot him >=D

Posted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 12:11 am
by Rainigul
XemnasXD wrote:d-dead....then whose lap was i sitting on :shock: oh god...i need a drink... :oops:


I liked those khakis you were wearing, they were nice and soft, just like your face.

Posted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 12:34 am
by Barotix
Waisha wrote:
heroo wrote:lol, very nice :p, only one thing, maybe stupid but what does lb mean? how many kilo is a lb?

Short for pound I think. It's almost half a kilo I think. It's an british invention, I think.


its american. for some odd reason we use a different system than the rest of the world :/

Posted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 2:29 am
by Itonami
I'm santa.

Lost some weight over the last few years.. WTB cookies. 8)

Posted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 2:33 am
by Vibrator
You forget santa carries Mgical fat. His fat has fairy dust which keeps the sleigh elevating so he visits 5000 houses a minute. Stop runing my dreams santa is real :( whoe else bought me my bike last year ?

Posted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 3:15 am
by Aiyas
Heh, it's nothing a little magic can't fix. :P


This was a good read, though.

Posted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 3:31 am
by Avalanche
That was EPIC.

Posted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 3:59 am
by Silver0
AvAlAnChE1 wrote:That was EPIC.

Agree I LMAO

Posted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 4:33 am
by San
lol, i read this 2 months ago
my friend printed it out and showed the whole shool :roll:

Posted: Tue Dec 11, 2007 5:13 am
by Allig2948
Santa is my gay lover :P