Silkroad Online Forums

Some of these are really funny


Customer: "I've been ringing 0700 2300 for two days and can't get through to
enquiries, can you help?"
Operator: "Where did you get that number from, sir?"
Customer: "It was on the door to the Travel Centre"
Operator: "Sir, they are our opening hours"

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Samsung Electronics
Caller: "Can you give me the telephone number for Jack?"
Operator: "I'm sorry, sir, I don't understand who you are talking about"
Caller: "On page 1, section 5, of the user guide it clearly states that
I need to unplug the fax machine from the AC wall socket and telephone Jack
before cleaning. Now, can you give me the number for Jack?"
Operator: "I think you mean the telephone point on the wall"

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RAC Motoring Services
Caller: "Does your European Breakdown Policy cover me when I am
travelling in Australia?"

Operator: "Doesn't the product give you a clue?"

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Caller (enquiring about legal requirements while travelling in France):

"If I register my car in France, do I have to change the steering wheel to the
other side of the car?"

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Directory Enquiries
Caller: "I'd like the number of the Argoed Fish Bar in Cardiff
please".
Operator: "I'm sorry, there's no listing. Is the spelling correct?"
Caller: "Well, it used to be called the Bargoed Fish Bar but the
'B' fell off".

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Then there was the caller who asked for a knitwear company in Woven.

Operator: "Woven? Are you sure?"
Caller: "Yes. That's what it says on the label; Woven in Scotland ".

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On another occasion, a man making heavy breathing sounds from a phone box told a
worried operator:


"I haven't got a pen, so I'm steaming up the window to write the number on".

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Tech Support: "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop".
Customer: "OK".
Tech Support: "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No".
Tech Support: "OK. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer: "No".
Tech Support: "OK, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this
point?"

Customer: "Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'".

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Tech Support: "OK. In the bottom left hand side of the screen, can you
see the 'OK' button displayed?"
Customer: "Wow. How can you see my screen from there?"

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Caller: "I deleted a file from my PC last week and I have just realised that I
need it.


If I turn my system clock back two weeks will I have my file back again?"

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There's always one. This has got to be one of the funniest things in a long
time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true
story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording
monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee
was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect organisation for
"Termination without Cause".

This is actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now
I know why they record these conversations!)

Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance may I help you?"
Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the
words went away."
Operator: "Went away?"
Caller: "They disappeared."
Operator: "Hmm so what does your screen look like now?"
Caller: "Nothing."
Operator: "Nothing??"
Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
Caller: "How do I tell?"
Operator: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??"
Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
Caller: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept
anything I type."
Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
Caller: "What's a monitor?"
Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV..
Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"
Caller: "I don't know."
Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the
power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"
Caller: "Yes, I think so."
Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's
plugged into the wall.


Caller: "Yes, it is."
Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there
were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find
the other cable."
Caller: "Okay, here it is."
Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into
the back of your computer."
Caller: "I can't reach."
Operator: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way
over??"
Caller: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's
because it's dark."
Operator: "Dark??"
Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have
is coming in from the window.


Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then."
Caller: "I can't."
Operator: "No? Why not?"
Caller: "Because there's a power failure."
Operator: "A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it
licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing

stuff your computer came in??"

Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
Operator: "Good.. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up
just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it
from."
Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"
Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??"
Operator: "Tell them you're far too stupid to own a computer!!!!!"

lol. love the word-perfect one.

shame the end part of WordPerfect is fake,. theyre funny but hell i remember reading these years ago

lol ^^

I worked in a callcenter and I feel the pain of those callcenter employees...

some people are so damn STUPID

Bastet wrote:

Caller: "I deleted a file from my PC last week and I have just realised that I
need it.


If I turn my system clock back two weeks will I have my file back again?"



This is actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee. (Now
I know why they record these conversations!)

Operator: "Ridge Hall, computer assistance may I help you?"
Caller: "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."
Operator: "What sort of trouble??"
Caller: "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the
words went away."
Operator: "Went away?"
Caller: "They disappeared."
Operator: "Hmm so what does your screen look like now?"
Caller: "Nothing."
Operator: "Nothing??"
Caller: "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
Operator: "Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out??"
Caller: "How do I tell?"
Operator: "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen??"
Caller: "What's a sea-prompt?"
Operator: "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the screen?"
Caller: "There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept
anything I type."
Operator: "Does your monitor have a power indicator??"
Caller: "What's a monitor?"
Operator: "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV..
Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on??"
Caller: "I don't know."
Operator: "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the
power cord goes into it. Can you see that??"
Caller: "Yes, I think so."
Operator: "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's
plugged into the wall.


Caller: "Yes, it is."
Operator: "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there
were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find
the other cable."
Caller: "Okay, here it is."
Operator: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into
the back of your computer."
Caller: "I can't reach."
Operator: "Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is??"
Caller: "No."
Operator: "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way
over??"
Caller: "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's
because it's dark."
Operator: "Dark??"
Caller: "Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have
is coming in from the window.


Operator: "Well, turn on the office light then."
Caller: "I can't."
Operator: "No? Why not?"
Caller: "Because there's a power failure."
Operator: "A power......... A power failure? Aha, Okay, we've got it
licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing

stuff your computer came in??"

Caller: "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
Operator: "Good.. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up
just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it
from."
Caller: "Really? Is it that bad?"
Operator: "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
Caller: "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them??"
Operator: "Tell them you're far too stupid to own a computer!!!!!"

these 2 a re the funniest

word perfect is fake, anyone saying that to a customer is insta-fired.

fcNz wrote:word perfect is fake, anyone saying that to a customer is insta-fired.

..... read first
it says he was fired

There's always one. This has got to be one of the funniest things in a long
time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This is a true
story from the Word Perfect Helpline, which was transcribed from a recording
monitoring the customer care department. Needless to say the Help Desk employee
was fired; however, he/she is currently suing the Word Perfect organisation for
"Termination without Cause".

lmao at the word perfect one

lol@ the word perfect one

I use to work at a call center too, we actually had a guy calling us asking "how do I turn my computer off, wich happened to be an apple lol

I did tech support for high speed internet lol wont say which company but i had a lady call saying her internet wasn't working O.o.... come to find out her computer wasn't even loading in to windows and there wasn't a thing wrong with her net lol

Best one = telephone jack IMO

That WordPerfect one is gold. I hope I never deal with people like that.

this is older than the internets, but Telephone Jack was awesome.

Heh, funny to see how many different versions are there of the "word pad". xD

In the original text it should be just "I'm typing text and nothing appears on the window", something like that, I'm a bad translator... ^^'

Tho it's old as hell & heaven it's still funny

Dystopia wrote:

Bastet wrote:"quote"

these 2 a re the funniest

totally agree with you

Lmao I actually Lol'd XD