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1. Save the whales. Collect the whole set.

2. A day without sunshine is like. Night.

3. On the other hand, you have different fingers.

4. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

5. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

6. Remember, half the people you know are below average.

7. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

8. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

9. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap

10. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.

11. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

12. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.

13. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.

14. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.

15. OK, so what's the speed of dark?

16. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

17. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

18. Every one has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.

19. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

20. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines

21. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?

22. I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

23. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

24. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, "What the hell happened?"

25. Just remember -- if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.

26. Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

27. Life isn't like a box of chocolates . . it's more like a jar of jalapeno's....What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.

EDIT: 28:If life shows you her back, kick her ass (thanks jabo!)

Lolz. Funny

LOL , nice.
Mind if I use some in a global spam one day?

Cyndaine wrote:
15. OK, so what's the speed of dark?

-299 792 458 m / s

There is only light, there is no dark.

Dark comes when light goes, dark is made by light that isn't there. It's instant

Nice statements

sure cheif, spam them all you want

im glad ppl liked this. laugh all you want

Cyndaine wrote:sure cheif, spam them all you want

im glad ppl liked this. laugh all you want

</3

MastaChiefX wrote:

Cyndaine wrote:sure cheif, spam them all you want

im glad ppl liked this. laugh all you want

</3

opps. CHIEF then. happy?

uber funny made my day

exality wrote:uber funny made my day

thankyou *curtsies* glad it made you laugh

Braaaaains...

Cyndaine wrote:4. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

11. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

14. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.

17. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

21. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?

27. Life isn't like a box of chocolates . . it's more like a jar of jalapeno's....What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.

4. Nah, its more like 82.3%
11. Heh, so true.
14. ::concentrates really really hard::
21. Actually, my Algebra teacher addressed this in 9th grade. You will never die from being scared half to death. You will only be half as alive as you were before you were scared. Lets say I have 100% life and get scared half to dead...50%. Another half...25%....12.5%...6.25%...3.125%...and so on. You will never reach 0%.
27. OMG. Don't remind me. >_< Makes my anus tingle whenever I think about that....err....nothing. :X

LuV3r8o1 wrote:

Cyndaine wrote:4. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

11. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

14. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.

17. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

21. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?

27. Life isn't like a box of chocolates . . it's more like a jar of jalapeno's....What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.

4. Nah, its more like 82.3%
11. Heh, so true.
14. ::concentrates really really hard::
21. Actually, my Algebra teacher addressed this in 9th grade. You will never die from being scared half to death. You will only be half as alive as you were before you were scared. Lets say I have 100% life and get scared half to dead...50%. Another half...25%....12.5%...6.25%...3.125%...and so on. You will never reach 0%.27. OMG. Don't remind me. >_< Makes my anus tingle whenever I think about that....err....nothing. :X

oh rlly?

lol

yes really.

and about the vending machine one, it's my favorite and has been on my msn name for like 7 months now

lol, gotta love random stuff like this

IMO, you can never take life seroiusly enough, cyndaine... most people fail to understand that ---> title change please . Anyway, great stuff you have there.

brain overloadding...cant handle....27...numbers...

Cyndaine wrote:1. Save the whales. Collect the whole set.

2. A day without sunshine is like. Night.

3. On the other hand, you have different fingers.

4. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

5. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

6. Remember, half the people you know are below average.

7. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

8. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

9. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap

10. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.

11. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

12. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.

13. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.

14. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.

15. OK, so what's the speed of dark?

16. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

17. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

18. Every one has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.

19. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

20. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines

21. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?

22. I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

23. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

24. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, "What the hell happened?"

25. Just remember -- if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.

26. Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

27. Life isn't like a box of chocolates . . it's more like a jar of jalapeno's....What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.

if somebody starts living life like this now or by it, they should shoot themselves.

Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.


so true

Just remember -- if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.

i'm sooo gonna put that in my sig

How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.

lol this one is my favourite. i said it to my friend today and she concentrated reaaaaly hard. then i raised my hand and she was like OMG and then i started laughing and she was like "oh". lol she acutally thought i was asking her to raise my hand.

well... this one is in spanish but...

Si la vida te da la espalda, pateale el culo.

``If life shows you her back, kick her ass´´


oh, and... whats being scared half to death?

nice! im gonna add that one

btw do u speak spanish jabo?