date with a sexchat bot
Posted: Sun Jan 02, 2011 12:56 pm
by satman83
found this on cracked...very funny 
http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-dates-with-sexchat-bot/
http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-dates-with-sexchat-bot/
Spoiler!
Me: I'll bet you are.
Dawnaballa1914: Yay someone to talk too!! ~~~~~<3
Me: What is that? You smiling at Mickey Mouse's penis?
Dawnaballa1914: I'm 20/F please tell me your a male???
Me: Tell you my a male did what? Finish your questions.
Dawnaballa1914: Cool... well im dawn and i work at a 24 Hour Fitness center and sometimes i like to come home and play with my cam
Me: Is "work at a 24 Hour Fitness center" a euphemism for how horny you are?
Me: And on a similar note, is "play with my cam" a euphemism for twiddling your robotic bean?
Me: That's a euphemism for playing with your clitoris.
Dawnaballa1914: I hate it when people can't actually see me saying stuff or fixing my hair or fixing my bra
Me: Yeah, people not watching you say stuff is the worst.
Me: And I love it when your bra's farked up.
Dawnaballa1914: U should come check me out at http://slnks.com/i1e just accept my invite on the page baby, its even more fun if we both have a cam = )
Me: You have a Page Baby?
Me: That's ADORABLE!
Dawnaballa1914: Come on read the page they won't charge you anything, the CC verification is just to make sure your atleast 18
Me: To make sure my atleast 18 does what?
Dawnaballa1914: well its hard to talk i got a show goin on right now, if anything come check me out some other time site is http://tinyurl.com/2a3kf3v
Me: Don't go!
Me: I need more convincing!
Me: Use your words!
Me: Even though I can't see you use them lol
Dawnaballa1914: hey sweetie
Me: Fix your bra.
Me: It's all farked up.
Dawnaballa1914: hi
Me: I think I'm in love with you.
Dawnaballa1914: hey sweetie
#2.
Our First Fight
Dawnaballa1914: are there any good men out there???????
Me: Yeah, I'm here, baby.
Me: It's been a while.
Me: You fixing your bra again?
Me: Hope your bra's still all sloppy and shit.
Me: Hello?
Me: Is this some kind of game to you?
Me: Seriously, I've been waiting for you for weeks. Now I'm putting myself out there, all vulnerable and whatnot, and you just ignore me?
Me: You'd better be busy fixing your sloppy bra right now.
Me: Um... HELLO!
Dawnaballa1914: are there any good men out there???????
Me: You never listen to me!
Me: We're in a fight.
Me: Do you HEAR ME, YOU SLOPPY-BRAED BITCH?!?!?
Dawnaballa1914: hey sweetie
#3.
Meeting Her Family
dawnabella1914: today is beautiful
Me: You're beautiful.
Me: I miss you.
Me: I'm sorry for how I acted.
dawnabella1914: Hello there.. My name is Stephanie.. Got ur ID through Messenger Directory
Me: WTF Stephanie? Get off Dawn's computer.
dawnabella1914: I love chatting with new people.. Would you like to chat today? Where are you from?
Me: You know where I'm from, Stephanie. This isn't cool. Is Dawn in the shower or something?
dawnabella1914: Nice Im 20 years old i'm going to school in Florida.. Can i ask you a question?
Me: Bullshit, Stephanie. You're 12 and you go to school down the street.
Me: Put Dawn on.
dawnabella1914: Do you like big booty girls with big tits? lol seriously cuz thats what ppl tell me i have..Is that too much for you to handle?
Me: People tell you that you have big booty girls with big tits? You're an idiot, Stephanie. What you just said is that people tell you that you have people.
Me: Put Dawn back on.
dawnabella1914: so yea i'm lonely would you like to have some kinky fun? Would you like to see me?
Me: I see you almost every morning when you're waiting for the bus to go to ELEMENTARY SCHOOL.
Me: If you're lonely, you should ask your mom to play Wii with you.
dawnabella1914: ok but i have no pictures on my laptop.. but i have a video camea that came with it
Me: THAT IS DAWN'S CAMERA.
Me: Stop using her stuff, she's going to be pissed.
dawnabella1914: lol ok goto http://www.showinvite.net/gjv5 and we can go 1 on 1 chat. Just accept the invite on the page baby
Me: Oh, wait. I guess this is Dawn.
Me: Sorry, baby.
Me: My mistake.
Me: See you on video fuck-chat in a few.
dawnabella1914: Don't worry baby its free to join this site, read teh page, they just need to verify ur age
Me: Yeah, I know the drill.
Me: Hope your bra's extra sloppy today.
dawnabella1914: I'll do anything you want me to do.. Do you see me? I can't chat with you on the site till you register
Me: Wait a second... if this were Dawn, she'd know that I'm already registered...
Me: GET OFF DAWN'S COMPUTER, STEPHANIE!!!!!
dawnabella1914: http://www.mywebcamcrush.com/StephiesAss20
#4.
Trouble In Paradise
dawnabella1914: LOOKING FOR MR. GOODBAR
Me: Go to the Farking store.
Me: It's called an "impulse buy."
Me: They have them in the check-out aisle.
dawnabella1914: Hey!! My name is Vanessa.. Got ur name thru messenger directory
Me: I don't know anyone named Vanessa.
Me: I know a Dawn.
Me: And Dawn's awful sister Stephanie.
dawnabella1914: I love chatting with new people.. Would you like to chat today? Where are you from?
Me: I'm from your stupid Farking face.
Me: Here's my ID.
Me: ::grabs crotch::
dawnabella1914: Nice Im 20 yrs old i'm going to school in Florida.. Can i ask u a question?
Me: You mean besides "Can i ask u [sic] a question?"
dawnabella1914: Do u like big booty girls that know how to shake their ass? hahahha lol but seriously i luv to dance..
Me: Was that a... joke?
Me: Why are you laughing?
dawnabella1914: is that too much for you?
Me: Is loving to dance too much for me?
Me: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!?
dawnabella1914: so yea i'm lonely would you like to have some kinky fun? Would u like to see me?
Me: I don't really care.
Me: Go out dancing if you're lonely.
dawnabella1914: ok but i have no pictures on my laptop.. but i have a video camera that came with it umm... watch me dance?!?
Me: Christ.
Me: If you have a video camera, then you can Farking take pictures.
Me: You're an idiot.
Me: But by all means send me a link to whatever.
dawnabella1914: lol ok goto http://www.showinvite.net/kh3f and we can go 1 on 1 chat. Just accept the invite on the page baby
Me: WHAT IS A PAGE BABY?
Me: ?!?!?!?!?!?
#5.
Spicing Things Up
dawnabella1914: hey r u around?
Me: Yeah.
Me: What kind of fake person are you?
dawnabella1914: hi sweetie
dawnabella1914: nothing about this is fake, im a nympho ever met one?
Me: What's a "nympho ever met one?"
dawnabella1914: i hope you want to chat with a horny girl today...
dawnabella1914: ummm whats not real?
Me: Oh. You want to roleplay?
dawnabella1914: i am a little busy right now, just got a new laptop trying to set my cam up..
Me: Yeah, setting up a cam on your computer could definitely be described as "busy."
dawnabella1914: i have a fetish for being on camera
Me: Well you'd better get it set up soon.
Me: Otherwise, how will you stay horny?
Me: Anyway, what roles do you want to try?
dawnabella1914: you can watch my webcam but you're not a kid right??
dawnabella1914: holy shit im wet right now, i got some toys... plz watch me play? I like when guys tell me what to do..
Me: Sorry.
Me: I'm a kid.
dawnabella1914: k ..well im gonna show you ..k?
Me: I'm 8.
dawnabella1914: http://fantasysexcams.net go there and my video will load, just click the yellow JOIN FREE button at the top of the page, its 100% free to join you only need a credit card to verify that you are over 18 ;p
dawnabella1914: u there?
Me: yeah sry my mom came in and yelled at me for a sec
Me: moms are mean
Me: are you boobs?
dawnabella1914: if you cum watch me i'll do whatever you want me to doââ'¬Â¦ fill out your info, its free k?
Me: you spelled "come" funny
Me: your funny
dawnabella1914: whats a bot?
Me: i like you
dawnabella1914: i use this site to play on cause i don't want to be recorded!ââ'¬Â¦this site doesn't allow people to record my cam! just click the yellow JOIN FREE button at the top of the page ;p
Me: i set up my video camera to record the screen
Me: just cuz im 8 doesnt mean im stuppid
dawnabella1914: u there?
Me: yeah i am here
Me: i had to make tinkle
Me: i say tinkle cuz i am 8
dawnabella1914: u there?
Me: yeah hi
Me: u there?
dawnabella1914: u there?
Me: i am horny as an 8 year old
Me: i want to see boobs on you
Me: u there?
dawnabella1914: Ok, now you really lost me?? bot???
dawnabella1914: credit card is just to verify your age, u get in for free thru my cam session invite since I'm a premium member, but u need to verify babe just click the yellow JOIN FREE button at the top of the page ;p
Me: i never said bot
Me: i just want to be horny cuz i am 8
dawnabella1914: wow, im so wet..i would love if u watched meââ'¬Â¦i promise u it will be fun
Me: i am wet too
Me: guys get wet 2, rite?
dawnabella1914: let me know if you need any help logging in..i'm gonna slip into something nice for you..k?
Me: i need help
Me: it asked if i was over 18
Me: i didn't want to lie
Me: now i can't watch ur boobs
dawnabella1914: whats a bot?
Me: i don't know
Me: like a robot?
Me: robots r cool
dawnabella1914: Ok, now you really lost me?? bot??
Me: u r not lost
Me: u r rite here
Me: i am 8 still
dawnabella1914: u there?
Me: i am so wet like u
Me: let me boob u
dawnabella1914: Like a transformer robot?? what the hell are u talking about?
Me: transformer robots aren't real
Me: im 8 and i know that
dawnabella1914: Ok, now you really lost me?? bot???
Me: maybe u r dum
dawnabella1914: u there?
Me: u there?
dawnabella1914: hey
Me: hi
dawnabella1914: hey
Me: hello
dawnabella1914: hey sweetie
Me: hi
dawnabella1914: u there?
Me: no
dawnabella1914: hey
#6.
Learning Her Language (or "Happily Ever After")
Me: I am horny.
dawnabella1914: wow, im so wet..i would love if u watched me... i promise u it will be fun
Me: Slut.
dawnabella1914: yea i am slut, so what..you love pussy right? well i love dick
Me: Cock.
dawnabella1914: i love it babe, i wish urs was here so I can grab on it
Me: Dick.
dawnabella1914: with how horny i am right now if you were in front of me i would deepthroat the whole thing
Me: Bitch.
dawnabella1914: make me your bitch
Me: **** you.
dawnabella1914: okay, that was rude! what's with the language!?
Me: **** you.
dawnabella1914: Right back at ya, PEACE!
Me: Hello.
dawnabella1914: hey sweetie
Read more: http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-dates-wit ... z19skOAhml
Dawnaballa1914: Yay someone to talk too!! ~~~~~<3
Me: What is that? You smiling at Mickey Mouse's penis?
Dawnaballa1914: I'm 20/F please tell me your a male???
Me: Tell you my a male did what? Finish your questions.
Dawnaballa1914: Cool... well im dawn and i work at a 24 Hour Fitness center and sometimes i like to come home and play with my cam
Me: Is "work at a 24 Hour Fitness center" a euphemism for how horny you are?
Me: And on a similar note, is "play with my cam" a euphemism for twiddling your robotic bean?
Me: That's a euphemism for playing with your clitoris.
Dawnaballa1914: I hate it when people can't actually see me saying stuff or fixing my hair or fixing my bra
Me: Yeah, people not watching you say stuff is the worst.
Me: And I love it when your bra's farked up.
Dawnaballa1914: U should come check me out at http://slnks.com/i1e just accept my invite on the page baby, its even more fun if we both have a cam = )
Me: You have a Page Baby?
Me: That's ADORABLE!
Dawnaballa1914: Come on read the page they won't charge you anything, the CC verification is just to make sure your atleast 18
Me: To make sure my atleast 18 does what?
Dawnaballa1914: well its hard to talk i got a show goin on right now, if anything come check me out some other time site is http://tinyurl.com/2a3kf3v
Me: Don't go!
Me: I need more convincing!
Me: Use your words!
Me: Even though I can't see you use them lol
Dawnaballa1914: hey sweetie
Me: Fix your bra.
Me: It's all farked up.
Dawnaballa1914: hi
Me: I think I'm in love with you.
Dawnaballa1914: hey sweetie
#2.
Our First Fight
Dawnaballa1914: are there any good men out there???????
Me: Yeah, I'm here, baby.
Me: It's been a while.
Me: You fixing your bra again?
Me: Hope your bra's still all sloppy and shit.
Me: Hello?
Me: Is this some kind of game to you?
Me: Seriously, I've been waiting for you for weeks. Now I'm putting myself out there, all vulnerable and whatnot, and you just ignore me?
Me: You'd better be busy fixing your sloppy bra right now.
Me: Um... HELLO!
Dawnaballa1914: are there any good men out there???????
Me: You never listen to me!
Me: We're in a fight.
Me: Do you HEAR ME, YOU SLOPPY-BRAED BITCH?!?!?
Dawnaballa1914: hey sweetie
#3.
Meeting Her Family
dawnabella1914: today is beautiful
Me: You're beautiful.
Me: I miss you.
Me: I'm sorry for how I acted.
dawnabella1914: Hello there.. My name is Stephanie.. Got ur ID through Messenger Directory
Me: WTF Stephanie? Get off Dawn's computer.
dawnabella1914: I love chatting with new people.. Would you like to chat today? Where are you from?
Me: You know where I'm from, Stephanie. This isn't cool. Is Dawn in the shower or something?
dawnabella1914: Nice Im 20 years old i'm going to school in Florida.. Can i ask you a question?
Me: Bullshit, Stephanie. You're 12 and you go to school down the street.
Me: Put Dawn on.
dawnabella1914: Do you like big booty girls with big tits? lol seriously cuz thats what ppl tell me i have..Is that too much for you to handle?
Me: People tell you that you have big booty girls with big tits? You're an idiot, Stephanie. What you just said is that people tell you that you have people.
Me: Put Dawn back on.
dawnabella1914: so yea i'm lonely would you like to have some kinky fun? Would you like to see me?
Me: I see you almost every morning when you're waiting for the bus to go to ELEMENTARY SCHOOL.
Me: If you're lonely, you should ask your mom to play Wii with you.
dawnabella1914: ok but i have no pictures on my laptop.. but i have a video camea that came with it
Me: THAT IS DAWN'S CAMERA.
Me: Stop using her stuff, she's going to be pissed.
dawnabella1914: lol ok goto http://www.showinvite.net/gjv5 and we can go 1 on 1 chat. Just accept the invite on the page baby
Me: Oh, wait. I guess this is Dawn.
Me: Sorry, baby.
Me: My mistake.
Me: See you on video fuck-chat in a few.
dawnabella1914: Don't worry baby its free to join this site, read teh page, they just need to verify ur age
Me: Yeah, I know the drill.
Me: Hope your bra's extra sloppy today.
dawnabella1914: I'll do anything you want me to do.. Do you see me? I can't chat with you on the site till you register
Me: Wait a second... if this were Dawn, she'd know that I'm already registered...
Me: GET OFF DAWN'S COMPUTER, STEPHANIE!!!!!
dawnabella1914: http://www.mywebcamcrush.com/StephiesAss20
#4.
Trouble In Paradise
dawnabella1914: LOOKING FOR MR. GOODBAR
Me: Go to the Farking store.
Me: It's called an "impulse buy."
Me: They have them in the check-out aisle.
dawnabella1914: Hey!! My name is Vanessa.. Got ur name thru messenger directory
Me: I don't know anyone named Vanessa.
Me: I know a Dawn.
Me: And Dawn's awful sister Stephanie.
dawnabella1914: I love chatting with new people.. Would you like to chat today? Where are you from?
Me: I'm from your stupid Farking face.
Me: Here's my ID.
Me: ::grabs crotch::
dawnabella1914: Nice Im 20 yrs old i'm going to school in Florida.. Can i ask u a question?
Me: You mean besides "Can i ask u [sic] a question?"
dawnabella1914: Do u like big booty girls that know how to shake their ass? hahahha lol but seriously i luv to dance..
Me: Was that a... joke?
Me: Why are you laughing?
dawnabella1914: is that too much for you?
Me: Is loving to dance too much for me?
Me: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!?
dawnabella1914: so yea i'm lonely would you like to have some kinky fun? Would u like to see me?
Me: I don't really care.
Me: Go out dancing if you're lonely.
dawnabella1914: ok but i have no pictures on my laptop.. but i have a video camera that came with it umm... watch me dance?!?
Me: Christ.
Me: If you have a video camera, then you can Farking take pictures.
Me: You're an idiot.
Me: But by all means send me a link to whatever.
dawnabella1914: lol ok goto http://www.showinvite.net/kh3f and we can go 1 on 1 chat. Just accept the invite on the page baby
Me: WHAT IS A PAGE BABY?
Me: ?!?!?!?!?!?
#5.
Spicing Things Up
dawnabella1914: hey r u around?
Me: Yeah.
Me: What kind of fake person are you?
dawnabella1914: hi sweetie
dawnabella1914: nothing about this is fake, im a nympho ever met one?
Me: What's a "nympho ever met one?"
dawnabella1914: i hope you want to chat with a horny girl today...
dawnabella1914: ummm whats not real?
Me: Oh. You want to roleplay?
dawnabella1914: i am a little busy right now, just got a new laptop trying to set my cam up..
Me: Yeah, setting up a cam on your computer could definitely be described as "busy."
dawnabella1914: i have a fetish for being on camera
Me: Well you'd better get it set up soon.
Me: Otherwise, how will you stay horny?
Me: Anyway, what roles do you want to try?
dawnabella1914: you can watch my webcam but you're not a kid right??
dawnabella1914: holy shit im wet right now, i got some toys... plz watch me play? I like when guys tell me what to do..
Me: Sorry.
Me: I'm a kid.
dawnabella1914: k ..well im gonna show you ..k?
Me: I'm 8.
dawnabella1914: http://fantasysexcams.net go there and my video will load, just click the yellow JOIN FREE button at the top of the page, its 100% free to join you only need a credit card to verify that you are over 18 ;p
dawnabella1914: u there?
Me: yeah sry my mom came in and yelled at me for a sec
Me: moms are mean
Me: are you boobs?
dawnabella1914: if you cum watch me i'll do whatever you want me to doââ'¬Â¦ fill out your info, its free k?
Me: you spelled "come" funny
Me: your funny
dawnabella1914: whats a bot?
Me: i like you
dawnabella1914: i use this site to play on cause i don't want to be recorded!ââ'¬Â¦this site doesn't allow people to record my cam! just click the yellow JOIN FREE button at the top of the page ;p
Me: i set up my video camera to record the screen
Me: just cuz im 8 doesnt mean im stuppid
dawnabella1914: u there?
Me: yeah i am here
Me: i had to make tinkle
Me: i say tinkle cuz i am 8
dawnabella1914: u there?
Me: yeah hi
Me: u there?
dawnabella1914: u there?
Me: i am horny as an 8 year old
Me: i want to see boobs on you
Me: u there?
dawnabella1914: Ok, now you really lost me?? bot???
dawnabella1914: credit card is just to verify your age, u get in for free thru my cam session invite since I'm a premium member, but u need to verify babe just click the yellow JOIN FREE button at the top of the page ;p
Me: i never said bot
Me: i just want to be horny cuz i am 8
dawnabella1914: wow, im so wet..i would love if u watched meââ'¬Â¦i promise u it will be fun
Me: i am wet too
Me: guys get wet 2, rite?
dawnabella1914: let me know if you need any help logging in..i'm gonna slip into something nice for you..k?
Me: i need help
Me: it asked if i was over 18
Me: i didn't want to lie
Me: now i can't watch ur boobs
dawnabella1914: whats a bot?
Me: i don't know
Me: like a robot?
Me: robots r cool
dawnabella1914: Ok, now you really lost me?? bot??
Me: u r not lost
Me: u r rite here
Me: i am 8 still
dawnabella1914: u there?
Me: i am so wet like u
Me: let me boob u
dawnabella1914: Like a transformer robot?? what the hell are u talking about?
Me: transformer robots aren't real
Me: im 8 and i know that
dawnabella1914: Ok, now you really lost me?? bot???
Me: maybe u r dum
dawnabella1914: u there?
Me: u there?
dawnabella1914: hey
Me: hi
dawnabella1914: hey
Me: hello
dawnabella1914: hey sweetie
Me: hi
dawnabella1914: u there?
Me: no
dawnabella1914: hey
#6.
Learning Her Language (or "Happily Ever After")
Me: I am horny.
dawnabella1914: wow, im so wet..i would love if u watched me... i promise u it will be fun
Me: Slut.
dawnabella1914: yea i am slut, so what..you love pussy right? well i love dick
Me: Cock.
dawnabella1914: i love it babe, i wish urs was here so I can grab on it
Me: Dick.
dawnabella1914: with how horny i am right now if you were in front of me i would deepthroat the whole thing
Me: Bitch.
dawnabella1914: make me your bitch
Me: **** you.
dawnabella1914: okay, that was rude! what's with the language!?
Me: **** you.
dawnabella1914: Right back at ya, PEACE!
Me: Hello.
dawnabella1914: hey sweetie
Read more: http://www.cracked.com/blog/6-dates-wit ... z19skOAhml