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Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 1:59 am
by inky
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/40310189/ns ... and_courtsHe refused to hire help to care for his wife when she started to become ill with dementia and instead insisted on doing everything for her himself.
When she moved to the home, Laird spoon-fed his wife at meals, going to see her three times a day, the Times said.
"He'd always kiss her goodbye and hold her hand," Nancy Grijalva, a family friend, told the Times. "He would never get mad at her and lose his patience. Whatever she asked of him, that's what he did."

Re: Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 3:03 am
by Apy
The story is sad, really now.
@ ror and inky, GET A ROOM !
Re: Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 3:08 am
by Mirosuke
Apy wrote:The story is sad, really now.
@ ror and inky, GET A ROOM !
lol exactly
just don't feed the troll. someone wants to get an award.

Re: Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 3:19 am
by cpinney
treat ror like a cheap $5 whore he likes it.
OT: i would have done the same.
Re: Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 3:26 am
by Heosphoros
Thats kind of sad, I would of probably killed myself afterwords. This story would actually make for a pretty good movie.
Re: Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 7:16 am
by MrTwilliger
It's such a sad story. Such dedication and compassion is so rare to find, with divorce rates increasing and "alternate" relationship structures spurting up a 70 year old marriage is a rare sight indeed. If it was a mercy killing, or whether he did it upon her wish, the barbaric act of murder has transgressed into a beautiful symbol for everlasting love.
I hope she rests easy now, as I do to him as well. The saddest part of this story is the loneliness his heart must feel. As sad as the realization is, n one deserves to lose true love. There's no emotion worse in this world than a broken heart

Re: Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 7:17 am
by Dbett5
Ror wrote:
I know I'm not meant to "feed the troll" and all that shit but seriously, sometimes human beings like you disgust me, how would you feel if you were their daughter? Get some empathy and respect you dick.
Re: Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 7:36 am
by Doron
damn. that's. sad but beautiful.
And yes, could easily be a movie. let's see who gets it first.
it starts with the gunshot, then the story will be told from him and the people who knew them.
Re: Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 9:07 am
by XMoshe
My grandpa pretty much does this too for his wife, although he doesn't go 3 times a day but he's there every day during the day. Kinda sad because he blames himself that she had to go to a nursing home and shit :/
But yeah this is dedication.
Re: Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 10:48 am
by Miguez
So much love :\
Re: Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 12:03 pm
by RuYi
Very sad to read about this. Dementia is terrible, and I can not even imagine how difficult it must have been to the husband. To witness her condition getting worse, to take care of her, to make that decision, and the consequences that came with it.
---
A little heads up about the disappearance of 914 posts on SRF, of which the most recent ones were posted in this thread. An unusual action, but since 99% of Ror's posts were off-topic anyway, I hardly doubt anyone would care. Personally I think getting rid of that nonsense is a great improvement to SRF.
Ror has been permanently banned, after many attempts to get this fool to behave all proved fruitless.
Think before you post, and make sure that whatever you reply is relevant to the discussion at hand. Posting crude comments, lolpics and irrelevant replies with the only purpose to stir things up and/or derail a thread is going to bite you in the ass one day or another.
Trying to discuss his banning is futile, but if you feel like you have to attempt, at least do so by pm, and not in this thread or anywhere else on the forum.
Re: Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 1:57 pm
by Swindler
True love right there.
Re: Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 6:04 pm
by Skyve
Aw ror

Re: Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 7:23 pm
by Ganja
ExSoldier wrote:Yay, ror
(is gone)
Fixed.
OT: They got married when they were 18 and 16 and been together ever since. He probably went crazy deciding whether to do it or not.
Re: Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 8:08 pm
by *BlackFox
Indeed, what a sad story.
But.. murder a person, Just because "YOU" think there life is worthless?
That's Just Wrong
ExSoldier wrote:Aw ror

In a way, I kinda agree
Re: Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 8:43 pm
by inky
My girlfriend asked me if I would do the same thing for her (been dating for almost 5 years). Kind of a difficult question to answer seriously. Thinking about it now, at such an old age, waiting for death alone after killing your spouse seems almost unfathomable -- especially since I don't believe in the afterlife or reincarnation. I wish I could but I don't and I highly doubt I ever will. I just told her we'd commit a skydiving suicide (I'm actually serious about it).
Part of (one of) my profession/college major is taking care of patients with dementia and mental illness. One of the first things I learned to do when I'm on the unit is to block out the thought that these people were once just like everyone here. Young, vigorous, carefree. To see people ranging from 45-105 years-old dying slowly, immobile, contracted, incontinent, disoriented, and confused with a bunch of tubes coming out of different holes seems pretty depressing sometimes. Well, like I said: down the road.
@BlackFox:
I don't think he believes that life is worthless. For any man to see the person he loves, the person he has been with for almost his entire life, suffering and slowly becoming dehumanized would be enough to consider doing what that man did. Slowly waiting to die is a lot harder than it sounds. That's why health care facilities have DNR, DNI, and DNH options. Personally, slowly suffering, rotting away, defecating and urinating myself in bed, losing my memory, not knowing who I am or where I'm at is definitely not the way I'd want to die.
@Ror's ban: Finally.

Re: Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 9:05 pm
by _Equal_
inky wrote:My girlfriend asked me if I would do the same thing for her (been dating for almost 5 years). Kind of a difficult question to answer seriously. Thinking about it now, at such an old age, waiting for death alone after killing your spouse seems almost unfathomable -- especially since I don't believe in the afterlife or reincarnation. I wish I could but I don't and I highly doubt I ever will. I just told her we'd commit a skydiving suicide (I'm actually serious about it).
Part of (one of) my profession/college major is taking care of patients with dementia and mental illness. One of the first things I learned to do when I'm on the unit is to block out the thought that these people were once just like everyone here. Young, vigorous, carefree. To see people ranging from 45-105 years-old dying slowly, immobile, contracted, incontinent, disoriented, and confused with a bunch of tubes coming out of different holes seems pretty depressing sometimes. Well, like I said: down the road.
@BlackFox:
I don't think he believes that life is worthless. For any man to see the person he loves, the person he has been with for almost his entire life, suffering and slowly becoming dehumanized would be enough to consider doing what that man did. Slowly waiting to die is a lot harder than it sounds. That's why health care facilities have DNR, DNI, and DNH options. Personally, slowly suffering, rotting away, defecating and urinating myself in bed, losing my memory, not knowing who I am or where I'm at is definitely not the way I'd want to die.
@Ror's ban: Finally.

I've discussed it with my gf and we've been living together for - oh, crap, probably 12 years now? I told her if I'm ever in a position where there is NOTHING left to do, that I want her to pull the plug. What is life if you can't enjoy living it to the fullest. If I'm a vegetable and a year has gone by and the doctors say no way, he's never coming out of it, then dammit, I want her to go on without me.
I don't know that I could do the same for her though.
@ ror's ban: <shrug> there are other people here who act almost as badly as he did, they'll just replace him. But if a ban is deserved, whatever.
Re: Down the road...before you know it.
Posted: Tue Nov 23, 2010 11:45 pm
by Doron
I would never want to be a vegetable. Srsly, anyone could pull the plug on me because I just don't like to be a burden to anyone.