A little eye opening.

[Key-J]

Hey Guys and Gals,

Let me cut to the chase, my roommate passed away 2 weeks ago, and well of course shocking and all that, i delt with all that had to be delt with, it opened my eyes to a question.

She was 20, literally just turned it August 2nd, and she had her whole life ahead of her, and although all of us who were her, or knew her close had the chance to say goodbye in our way, i did feel bad for some of her online friends.

Although she was an athlete, she did have a bit of a internet side to her, and i guess thats what made us close as roomates cuz it wasnt Ying and Yang i guess, even those are in harmony... wtvr.

What opened my eyes was that, because of chance one of her online friends was actually a IRL friend of ours, i managed to inform her of her passing, and she let her Online friends know.

However, think about this. IF you, god forbidding and knocking on wood were to pass suddenly in the future, would you 1) want your online friends to know. 2)want to have, or already have some way of letting them know?

I know it's a grim topic, and i would appreciate some maturity when replying, because this actually did happen. It just opened my eyes to realize how a person no longer only has one side of them, i mean sure i have all my IRL friends, who i adore and love, but of course there are people who i have come to know from around the world through the Internet that i would easily consider a close friend, and well i would like to know if anything happened to them god forbid.

[EvGa]

Sorry to hear. Having played sro for the last 4 yearsand staying in the same guild with pretty much the same people, I have made many 'online' friends. Some closer than others. Yes, I would want them to be informed of my passing. My brother plays sro with me and many of my friends are friends on FB. They would find out.

I might as well be the first to ask, what happened?

[Midori]

I might as well be the first to ask, what happened?

thats what i was gonna say.


also, shit sux bro, but i would want the people i know online to know that i died.

[cpinney]

yes i would want them to know, i have added some to my facebook and after a while i think they would get what happened.

[Hostage]

Maybe I'm the horrible person here but no; I wouldn't want them to find out and just rather have them think I got bored and stopped signing in/visiting what ever said medium of connection it was we had.

To explain my self it's because I find it hard to be "friends" with people online and usually look at them like acquaintances. Sure I'm close with people and talk to a lot of them on a daily basis whether that be people from past guilds or forums I've become apart of over the years but I still find it hard to consider those people friends, it's not the same. I don't get to see these people personally, I don't get to learn their traits ( if they make weird gestures with their hands when they talk), I don't get to look directly into their eyes/face when we talk so I can't tell if what they're telling me is genuine or not. It's just not the same bond you form that I've come to associate with "friendship".

So because of that lack of bond I feel it would just be unneeded heart ache. What can that person really do? mourn? To whom? Other people online who are in the same position as them? A position of not being able to see they're friend one last time (maybe the first time ever) but stuck in front of their computer screens instead? That feeling would suck. It would be so much easier to have them write you off as another "friends come and go" and someone who just moved on from that game, forums, IM, social site, whatever.

Then again who cares. You're dead. :/

[.curve]

I've thought of this a few times. Mostly while driving. Like..if I were to get into an accident right now, would the people I talk to on a day to day basis, even in WoW, ever find out?

I'd like for them to. I have a real close irl friend that plays WoW also, so I'd hope he got the word out. I'd also like to think that my family would tell that friend. iSinnnnnnn, if I ever pass away unexpectedly, tell people on WoW, TDC, etc.

To Key-J, I'm sorry for your loss. Quite an interesting topic.

[Gaigemasta]

I'd want people to know too, thank goodness my cousin has all of my account info to about everything I log into, I know he would do that for me, and I'd do the same

yah and sorry for you loss bro, it hurts a lot to lose close people, and thats a given, just realize life must go on, and don't let yourself lag behind, it just makes things worse.

[/Pi]

For me, it depends on the online community/network. It really depends on the level of interaction you had with people online. IRL friends that I have on facebook would definitely find out about it sooner or later. I've been in SRF for years now but the interactions I've had are akin to small talks and always with a mask, so I really wouldn't want the news to go out if I ever bite the dust. Compare this to say WoW where I'd almost always be in vent and have gone through guild dramas and rages on raid wipes. Haven't met any of them IRL but I'd still want them to know ("It's almost raid time, where the f*ck is Geno?!")

And speaking of facebook, I've read an article before regarding the display of mourning on people's pages. IIRC, if fb finds out a user has died, they keep his/her page up for a certain timeframe - long enough for friends to pay their respects, etc. and short enough before vandalisms come in.

Oh, and here's a sample of what the countless possibilities internet anonymity brings when death is the issue:

[Key-J]

I know, it's shocking because she was so young and a really fit girl. She passed away from a Seizure, but the Autopsy revealed nothing. So her dad is kinda angry about that, because i guess he just wanted that closure (not kidding, his wife passed away end of July) and Him and Bree (her name) were the ultimate Father Daughter relationship. The guy lost everything.

But yeah, if i were to pass, i would want people to know, and like some of you, i have let my more personal world creep and mix with my online world, friends from different Online places i guess you could say have been added to FB and so on, i guess the word would get out, but it kinda made me think the day i told her friend... it would suck for someone to just dissapear, for all we can ever hope to be is a memory.

However, i understand your point of view Hostage

[Jambi]

i think that i'd prefer that my online friends know that,with some of them i have a real good friendship,we talk with webcam,via msn so i can say that those are pretty much like real friends,anyway they would find out cuase of FB friendship,cause even if haven't seen em on webcam etc they would read on FB page.
Anyway... dying at 20 cause an epilectic attack is so sad,she must have had some problems..those attacks don't come randomly,i've got a friend that had like 2-3of them and he's 18 now.

Sorry for your loss dude..life goes on for you now!

[Fiction]

Key-J is making me sad and worried My wife is around her age and is an athlete. Here mom has battled cancer for as long as I could remember, and I'm always worried she'll get it as well.

OT: I don't think I'd want them to know. Back in sro, before the whole facebook thing kicked off, we had a few people that "died" on Xian in our guild or union. Once we thought this guy was completely B.Sing us about a guild member dying... then he showed us his myspace with all the R.I.P. on it.

[iGod]

In my opinion you need to have a gigantic fucking ego to think people would care if you died, your irl friends probably wouldn't care, I can't imagine online friends. I'd be dead and I'm pretty sure I'd care even less :>

[Swindler]

In my opinion you need to have a gigantic fucking ego to think people would care if you died, your irl friends probably wouldn't care, I can't imagine online friends. I'd be dead and I'm pretty sure I'd care even less :>

You dont seem to have any real friends.

[Fiction]

In my opinion you need to have a gigantic fucking ego to think people would care if you died, your irl friends probably wouldn't care, I can't imagine online friends. I'd be dead and I'm pretty sure I'd care even less :>

I think that World of Warcraft is getting to you... I think you need to QQ and get an actual social life I miss you already

[dom]

I depend on bakemaster to inform you all.

[Midori]

In my opinion you need to have a gigantic fucking ego to think people would care if you died, your irl friends probably wouldn't care, I can't imagine online friends. I'd be dead and I'm pretty sure I'd care even less :>

either troll or you have no friends.

[ZaKnighT]

In my opinion you need to have a gigantic fucking ego to think people would care if you died, your irl friends probably wouldn't care, I can't imagine online friends. I'd be dead and I'm pretty sure I'd care even less :>

You dont seem to have any real friends.

so true!!

[*BlackFox]

I'm so sorry to hear that.. and Yes, I would want them to know.

your irl friends probably wouldn't care, I can't imagine online friends

Seriously, that's the most farked up thing
I've ever heard in my life

[wootpops]

yes some of them, I feel really close to a couple people despite never meeting them. In fact most them are from my old province, so we always had something in common. But im sure alot of "friends" wouldn't care but i know some would.

[XemnasXD]

that i died is not important, that i can no longer make the scheduled raid times and carry my responsibility as a member of the guild, this they should be made aware of...

for the rest of my online friends i'll gladly just fade from memory, i've forgotten so many myself anyone of them could be dead...but better just to keep forgetting about them

[McLovin1t]

In my opinion you need to have a gigantic fucking ego to think people would care if you died, your irl friends probably wouldn't care, I can't imagine online friends. I'd be dead and I'm pretty sure I'd care even less :>

You dont seem to have any real friends.

Just what I was thinking. Maybe not online friends would care, but real life friends would 100%.

[Hostage]

that i died is not important, that i can no longer make the scheduled raid times and carry my responsibility as a member of the guild, this they should be made aware of...

for the rest of my online friends i'll gladly just fade from memory, i've forgotten so many myself anyone of them could be dead...but better just to keep forgetting about them

What a guy.

[Squirt]

I think that after a while, even if you hate a member of an online community you would feel a bit sad to a certain extent

[Isis]

Yes I would, I've been on here for 4 years and have made some good friends (I think), even though a lot of them have moved on from here. And other online friends, on FB and other forums.

So sad to hear about your friend.

[piootr]

Yea, I'd want the few 5-6 online friends that I've known for a good 6 years now to know. I consider this group (at minimum) as close as my real life friends.

[Doron]

My "online friends" will cheer when they find out I'm dead, since I only have online enemies...

But I could imagine that if they're close friends, then I say yeah

[*BlackFox]

My "online friends" will cheer when they find out I'm dead

Damn.. that's a creepy thought!

[/Pi]

My "online friends" will cheer when they find out I'm dead

Damn.. that's a creepy thought!

[iGod]

In my opinion you need to have a gigantic fucking ego to think people would care if you died, your irl friends probably wouldn't care, I can't imagine online friends. I'd be dead and I'm pretty sure I'd care even less :>

You dont seem to have any real friends.

Just what I was thinking. Maybe not online friends would care, but real life friends would 100%.

My social life aside, people would probably care, but I don't expect them to, that's all. I think expecting people to care is ultra-egoistic. Maybe I'm just "unnaturally" apathetic to death and all that stuff.

Think/expect = big difference, sorry.

[Deadsolid]

I'd want something fucking hilarious written, like this:

that i died is not important, that i can no longer make the scheduled raid times and carry my responsibility as a member of the guild, this they should be made aware of...

Or: Deadsolid timed out.



On a slightly related note, as of now the last thing I want to hear would be this:


Serious note: Sorry for your loss, Key-J.